Everyone loves a player… said no one ever. If you’re falling for his BS, then you’re bound to get your heart broken. The problem with players isn’t that they’re good liars, it’s that they’re so damn charming you want to believe their lies. So how do you spot one?
He sounds too good to be true. If it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is. Nobody’s perfect and everyone has their flaws, so if you haven’t found any, you better start looking a little harder.
He’s too smooth. Players love to throw out over-the-top compliments from the get go. Unfortunately, women love to feed into these compliments. Just remember, if it sounds like a line, it probably is one and he’s just perking you up so he can reel you in real fast.
He refuses to commit. Ah, commitment-phobia. Sadly, it’s far too common. If you’re repeatedly shot down because he’s “not ready for a relationship,” he’s probably never going to be, because he’s just not that into you.
He won’t talk about your future. Most couples (even ones that don’t last) love to discuss what they want their future to be like. If every time you bring up future plans, he changes the subject or starts an argument, it’s because he doesn’t see you in his life long-term.
He gets pissed if you just show up. Popping in on guys’ night isn’t cool, but surprising him with dinner at home is romantic. If he gets pissed off because you showed up unannounced when he supposedly had zero plans for the night, then he’s hiding something. Most likely that something is that you could have walked in on him with someone else.
He doesn’t want you to meet his friends. And he may not even want to meet yours. Meeting friends can be a big step, but after a month in, you should have each met someone from each other’s lives. Whatever excuse he has, the real reason is so that you won’t hear about any of his dirty deeds through the grapevine.
You catch him in little white lies. If he’s lying about the little stuff, then he’s probably lying about the big stuff, too. With most little white lies, there was really no point in lying in first place, so why is he automatically covering his tracks?
He randomly ghosts you. Does he disappear some days? If you can’t get a hold of him by phone or text for days at a time, his absence was intentional. Nobody’s phone dies for three days and the cell service didn’t fail on just your texts. He got them all. He just doesn’t care enough to check in with you.
He hides his phone. If his phone is attached at the hip and he ignores all texts and calls when you’re together, there’s a reason for that and it’s not that he wants to give you his undivided attention. Happy couples typically don’t give a crap if their partner sees a random text message — they’ll leave their phones on the table during a Netflix binge or forget to take it with them to the bathroom. A man who never forgets his phone is hiding something.
He doesn’t make plans or only calls at the last minute. If everything is “maybe” or “some other time”, then you can never get mad at him for breaking plans. He’s leaving his schedule open for the possibility that something better will come along. It’s a sad truth, but if he really wants to see you, then he’ll schedule a proper date.
You’ve got a really bad feeling about this. Some women are completely blind to player BS, while others choose to ignore the warning signs. If your gut is telling you something is wrong, listen to it. Players leave a trail everywhere they go, following your gut’s breadcrumbs is the best way out of the woods.
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