11 Ways You’re Ruining Your Relationship Without Even Realizing It

When you’re in a relationship, you  want to be the best girlfriend you can be. You usually go out of your way to be sweet and thoughtful, to compromise and to try and be selfless, which is great and all. But sometimes those things actually end up encouraging your guy to act out and he ends up getting away with some serious BS, even if he doesn’t realize he’s doing it. A better relationship starts with you, so get your own behavior in check and stop doing these 11 things.

  1. Doing everything he asks. It’s sweet that you want to do things to help make your man’s life easier, but you’ve got your own crap to do, too. If you keep coddling him, he’ll begin to expect it all the time, and when you don’t do it, he’ll you give you crap about it.
  2. Giving up your plans for him all the time. It’s great that you want to make a compromise and show him you care by canceling a night out with the girls to hang with him instead, but doing this all the time will not only result in the loss of your friends, it’ll also make him think he’s always in charge of the plans.
  3. Talking crap about yourself to him. It’s common for women to be critical of our own appearances, but if you’re constantly talking badly about yourself, he might think it’s OK to point out your flaws, as well. You don’t need anyone else telling you negative things about yourself. He should be your biggest fan and think you’re perfect as-is.
  4. Letting him flirt with other women. We’re all guilty of it.  Sometimes we take friendly too far and we accidentally flirt with someone else. When it’s occasional and accidental, it isn’t a big deal because we all make mistakes, but if he’s always flirting with other girls and you let him, that could lead to him thinking he can cheat, too.
  5. Putting up with cheating. I’m not here to tell you how to run your relationship, but if he’s a serial cheater and you keep taking him back, you’re making it OK for him to basically treat you like crap. If he has no problems being unfaithful to you in the bedroom, what makes you think he’ll be loyal in any other way?
  6. Letting him make fun of you to other people. Couples joke about embarrassing things that have happened to their friends, but if your man is always telling people about your embarrassing moments and you just sit there and take it, he might share something really private and humiliating one day. Plus, if you finally do get upset, he’ll think you’re blowing it out of proportion.
  7. Putting up with being called “over-emotional.” When he bleeds out his privates for a week a month, then he can tell you that you’re being too emotional! Until then, try not to be a raving mad person, but don’t let him make you feel bad if something genuinely upsets you.
  8. Letting him use you. This one is hard because it comes in a lot of forms. If you’re getting nothing out of your relationship and you stick around, he’ll keep using you, whether it be for money, sex, or anything else.
  9. Skipping your sexual needs for his. Some guys are the worst at taking care of their sexual partners. I don’t know why they think this is OK, but if you keep letting him skip out on getting you off, you’re perpetuating the problem and making him think his needs are above yours. They sure as hell aren’t
  10. Not asking for commitment if that’s what you want.If you’ve been dating for a long time and you want commitment but he keeps avoiding it, it’s time to tell him to do it or you’re out. Letting him continue to amble along aimlessly opens the door for him to chat because you aren’t official.
  11. Letting him talk down to you. He’s no better than you, so don’t let him talk to you like he is. Name-calling, rudeness, insults — they have no place in a loving relationship. If he won’t cut it out, then you need to reconsider his place beside you. You deserve more!
C. is an aspiring yogi and Ph.D student who loves her dogs, bright lipstick and to travel. Find her on IG @drparko121314