12 Modern-Day Signs Your Relationship Is No Longer Casual

We’ve all dated people we thought were something special. Then after a month of extreme highs and desperate lows, we realize the romance was just casual. Of course, by then we’ve wasted a month of our lives and gotten our hearts broken in the process. That’s why it’s important to pay attention to the signs that he’s actually serious so you don’t waste your time.

  1. You Follow Him On Instagram. In this day in age, it’s a big deal to follow someone on social media. Follows mean something! You can’t just go around following everyone who lives and breathes. If you’ve chosen to follow him on Instagram, Twitter, and Snapchat, that means you see this thing lasting. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t waste a follow.
  2. You’ve both Deleted Your Dating Apps. You know your relationship is serious when you delete your dating apps without being asked. Maybe you’re not ready to get married but you’re definitely looking at the relationship with potential. If you were unsure, you’d keep your dating apps as security. Just in case you needed a quick flirt.
  3. You Don’t Just Have Sex. Do you have sex every time you sleep over or he stays at yours? If the answer is “no,” your relationship is much more than casual. In the beginning, sex is usually constant. Once things become more serious, sleepovers are about more than sex — they’re about conversation, snuggling, and eating junk food.
  4. You Have Plans Next Month. We usually don’t realize our relationship is serious until we have that “wow” moment. For most people, it’s when you comfortably start making plans well past the weekend. You’re not afraid to schedule a trip for next month or buy him a birthday gift weeks in advance, are you? That’s because you don’t see an expiration date on your relationship.
  5. His Family Follows You On Social. Not only does his family know about you but they follow you on social media. Family and friends don’t usually make that move unless they think the relationship will last. If they thought you were just another girl, they wouldn’t go that extra mile to connect with you.
  6. You’re Comfortable In Silence. You can spend hours laughing but you can also happily sit in silence. That’s because your relationship isn’t casual. Neither of you feels the need to overcompensate with conversation all the time. You’re comfortable doing nothing, but sitting in silence, watching The Office while scrolling on your phones.
  7. People Know About The Relationship. You usually keep your relationships on the down-low, right? After all, what’s the point of telling people if things are going to fizzle out a few weeks later? We get it. That’s why it’s such a big deal that you told your friends and family about the relationship. If you didn’t see him long-term, you wouldn’t have told your grandmother.
  8. You’re On His Lock Screen. Have you landed a spot on his phone screen? That means he really, really likes you. So much so that he wants to be reminded of you every single time he touches his phone. Not only that, but he wants anyone who sees his phone to know he’s taken. He wouldn’t do that if the relationship was just casual.
  9. He Knows Your Coffee Order. He knows your coffee order and you know his. That’s because you spend a lot of time together and because you pay attention to each other. You know he hates broccoli and he knows you put ketchup on everything. Your relationship is serious when you know exactly what snack to buy them at the grocery store.
  10. Your Relationship Is Public. Maybe you haven’t posted a picture of him with the caption “BOYFRIEND” but you’ve posted pictures of him and vice versa. Your relationship status is clear to everyone who follows you, as is his. You might not realize things have gone from casual to serious, but take a look at your feed. Have you posted more than two pictures together? It’s a ting-ting.
  11. You Text During The Day. People in casual relationships don’t text that much. If they do, it’s usually after hours and about sex. But you two text during the day… all the time. You talk about your job, friends, career goals, etc. If your relationship was just causal, neither of you would be taking this much interest in the other.
  12. You Know His Netflix Password. If you know his Netflix password, you two are basically married. Yes, seriously. People don’t just give their passwords out willy nilly. It takes a level of trust to exchange personal information. (Especially for streaming services.) He has to trust you won’t give it to your friends or ruin his watch list. Regardless if it’s Netflix, HBO, or Hulu, if you know his password, your relationship isn’t casual.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.