Relationships aren’t always easy. In fact, they’re probably one of the hardest (yet most rewarding) things about life. But one of the most common reasons that great relationships fail is down to is one simple thing: communication – or, more accurately, lack thereof. Communication is key to a healthy relationship, and while no article on the internet is ever going to teach you how to be an effective communicator (that happens through real life social interactions), there are some tips that you can gather that can definitely put you on the right track to a happy and healthy relationship.
Here are 12 sentences that you will need to feel comfortable uttering at some point if you want to keep your relationship healthy.
- “It’s my fault.” A relationship can’t thrive if pride keeps getting in the way. This three word sentence can help you from move on from any difficult problems you may be facing with your partner.
- “I love you.” You should say “I love you” every day to your partner – say it loud, say it proud, and say it often! The more you tell a person you love them, the more they believe you!
- “If it matters to you, then it matters to me.” Let your partner know that you are on their side. If it’s an issue that you’ve never had to deal with before but they feel passionately about, then it should be as important to you as it is to them.
- “I’m sorry.” And not the lazy, non-apology kind of sorry. Learning how to say “I’m sorry”, and genuinely mean it, is vital to a healthy relationship.
- “I know I hurt you and I would never want to do that.” When you’ve hurt your partner, you have to make them understand that hurting them was never the objective. By using this sentence, you help them understand that your intentions towards them are only good, and that if you ever hurt them, it was accidental and you’d never want to repeat it.
- “I shouldn’t have said that.” When we misspeak, we often get defensive and try to rationalize whatever it is that we’ve said. Instead, learn how to identify sentences/phrases that you said that are not appropriate/loving/supportive and call attention to the fact that they shouldn’t have been said in the first place.
- “I care if you’re [insert negative emotion here].” If the person you love is sad, upset, mad, frustrated, then it’s important that they know that you care that they’re in this state of distress.
- “I respect what makes you happy or sad, even though I may not understand it myself.” Don’t dismiss your partner’s feelings just because you don’t necessarily understand them. Dismissing feelings (or counting them as irrational) will make them shut down communication with you. And, as we all know, communication is key to a great relationship.
- “How are you?” Sometimes, when we spend a lot of our time with a person, we forget to ask them the most basic of questions. How are you? How was your day? How was work? All of these can go a long way in strengthening your bond.
- “Can I help you?” Not meant to be said in a shop assistant kind of way, but in a “What can I do to help you with XYZ?” kind of way. This can be in relation to simpler things – like making the dinner or cleaning the house – but it can also be applied to bigger, more important things, like stress with work, bereavement, or financial problems.
- “I miss you.” This one little sentence can make a person feel like the center of the universe. Make sure to let your partner know their absence is felt when you’re not together.
- “Maybe you’re right.” This is a great spin on the “OK, I’M WRONG. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR?” defensive position that you’ve probably come across a number of times. The problem with placing blame is that someone has to lose. Shift the perspective and instead allow someone to win by using positive language.