Everybody talks about emotional unavailability, but what about the opposite? Although the concept of emotional maturity and openness may seem elusive, there ARE actually plenty of guys out there who will pour their hearts out and let you in. Here are 12 signs you’ve landed one of these magical beings:
He can effectively share his feelings. A sure sign of someone who’s emotionally available is that he’s in tune with his feelings and can communicate them with you. Not only is he able to do this, but he’s also willing to. He tells you when he’s afraid, that he really likes you, and he lets you know when something bothers him. This is a great sign that a successful relationship between the two of you is in your future.
He can handle conflict with grace and respect. Inevitably, conflict will arise in a relationship from time to time. A solid sign that he’s emotionally available is that he treats you with respect and he sits down to face the conflict with you head-on. He doesn’t run away or make a fuss. Instead, he’s willing to get into the difficult stuff with you.
He’s reliable with plans and promises. You know he’s going to show up when the two of you make plans. Not only is he there, but he’s also on time. This is because he stays true to his word both with plans and with other commitments. When he promises that he’s going to work on being better at something about himself, he follows through. Reliability is a sexy sign of emotional availability.
He communicates effectively. He’s sure to let you know when something’s wrong by communicating in a clear, kind, and effective way. You don’t have to worry about having that experience of trying to communicate with a brick wall. Rather, his communication is crystal clear in all departments, which leaves you two on the same page.
He’s clearly moved on from his past. A sign of emotional availability is that he isn’t all tied up with his past. He’s free of emotional entanglements and has steered clear of exes and drama. He’s over those he’s seen before you and is open enough to start again with a clear plate. Your emotionally available guy knows the importance of moving forward into the present.
His actions line up with his words. What and he says and what he does are one. You can trust him because he does what he says he’s going to do and he acts like who he says he is. You’re not left wondering, guessing, or worrying because he’s shown you over and over again that you can trust his words and actions.
Commitment is great in his book.He isn’t the kind of guy who will run for the hills the second you bring up commitment. Rather, he knows he has what it takes to be one half of a committed relationship. He’s all for commitment if you two are right for each other and he’s happy to be very upfront about it. He isn’t shy in saying that he’s also looking for a relationship.
He very clearly shows that he cares. He’s the kind of guy who goes out of his way to show you that he cares about you. He does things like text you on a regular basis, makes plans with you ahead of time, and is very attentive when you’re together. You never have to wonder about whether or not he cares about you because he’s always trying to make it very clear.
He shares his vulnerabilities with you. Rather than just pretending everything is cool all of the time with him, he shows you what makes him human. He’s disclosed some fears and vulnerabilities that he has in hopes that it will bring you two closer and that you’ll understand him better. This is his emotional availability because he knows vulnerability is a strength, not weakness.
He’s good about the phone. He’s not one of those guys who’s great in person and awful when calling or texting. Whether your guy prefers to call you or text you regularly, he’s consistent with his methods. You’ve grown to expect certain communications from him and he keeps showing up in that way. You don’t have to be left guessing.
He’s honest with himself and you. You don’t have to worry about him lying to you because he can’t be honest with himself. Rather, he’s gotten very good about being honest with himself and in turn being able to be honest with those around him. This is helpful in continuing to build trust between the two of you because you know that you can take him at his word.
He has a support network. It’s always a grim sign when you start to see a guy and he has no friends. Your guy, on the other hand, has tons of friends. This is important because he leans on those friends in tough times as well as talks to them when he’s struggling with something. You aren’t his sole support system, giving the relationship (and you) room to breathe.
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