Ladies, Raise Your Hand If A Guy Has Ever Said Any Of These Obnoxiously Sexist Things To You

Ladies, Raise Your Hand If A Guy Has Ever Said Any Of These Obnoxiously Sexist Things To You ©iStock/EXTREME-PHOTOGRAPHER

Every woman has undoubtedly experienced blatant sexism at one point or another, but what we experience much more frequently are microaggressions. Microaggressions are statements or actions of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group. Often, this subtle sexist shade is given by well-meaning guys who think they’re actually being kind of sweet. Here are 13 things guys say that have unintended sexist undertones:

  1. “I like how you don’t wear too much makeup.” There’s nothing wrong with a guy telling his girlfriend or female friend that her makeup looks great today. I wouldn’t be surprised if every lady he said that to responded positively. However, saying something like, “I like how you don’t wear too much makeup” is surprisingly sexist. He might think he’s telling you that you’re naturally beautiful, but he’s also implying that women who love to put on a full face of makeup are high-maintenance or shallow, and he doesn’t like them because of that.
  2. “You don’t need to wear so much makeup.” The other side of this coin is telling a woman that she’s wearing “too much makeup,” AKA imply again that she’s naturally beautiful without the assistance of foundation and blush. But what he’s actually doing is trying police what I’m putting on my face, something I probably enjoy doing and take pride in. Trust me, no man is making me swoon over how down-to-earth he is with this little nugget.
  3. “Let me get the door for you, Miss.” Often, when men are criticized for microaggressions, they’ll often use chivalry as a defense. Come on—you can’t argue against a guy being chivalrous, right? Nah, you totally can and should. Chivalry is a notion that comes from men taking care of women because we are the “weaker sex.” It would be such a nice idea if we were, say, all taking care of each other. But when one gender is singled out, that’s when you need to call BS. When it comes to a door being opened, this is a man going out of his way to invade your space without asking and make sure you get through a doorway without injuring your delicate self. Now, if he’s doing that for everyone, sure! How kind. But if he’ll just as easily let that door close on the dude behind you, that’s just rude.
  4. “Hey beautiful, I love the way that skirt looks on you!” Now, I personally believe men know this isn’t sweet. What decent man is still catcalling, thinking it’s making women feel good about themselves? But I include this because women are frequently told, often after rebuking or ignoring a catcaller, that they should “stop being a bitch” and “take the compliment.” I think we can agree that embarrassing me in public and making me feel unsafe isn’t a compliment, it’s harassment.
  5. “Smile—you’re too beautiful not to smile.” Nope. N-O-P-E. This is actually a form of catcalling as someone is giving unwelcome commentary on your physical appearance. He might think he’s telling a pretty girl she’s too beautiful to look sad, but we’re hearing a sexist command from a stranger. No one is going to get out of this situation well.
  6. “You like whiskey? That’s so cool.” What, as opposed to girly drinks? Don’t make me laugh. I can sip on a Cosmo just as happily as I can shoot whiskey, so please stop gendering my drinks and kindly leave me be.
  7. “I like how you’re not mad about food and fitness.” Again, this is a guy trying to applaud me for being the cool, low-maintenance girl of his hipster dreams, but he’d be off the mark. First of all, I do care about food and fitness. Just because I’m tucking into this burger right now doesn’t mean I don’t take care of myself like an adult. The fact that I can somehow find the nerve to eat what I want despite the male gaze potentially not liking the extra weight on my body is pretty brave of me. Wow, I never realized I was a hero until just now.
  8. “You have such great jokes, most women aren’t this funny!” Oh God, the whole “women aren’t funny” trope is dead. We buried it long ago, probably around the last time this guy got a woman into bed with his antiquated microaggressions.
  9. “Oh, you like X football team? Is it because the quarterback is cute?” Um, no it’s because I like watching football and supporting the local team. I guess the better question is does he like X football team because the quarter back is cute? Because I would never judge him like he just judged me.
  10. “Wow, you play video games? You don’t look like a gamer.” Is it because I have boobs and a vagina? If so, his idea of what a gamer looks like is old news. It’s 2017—playing video games aren’t strictly something guys play in their basement or unhappy husbands play to get away from their ~nagging wives~.
  11. “I like how you don’t freak out about little things.” Okay, so what he’s doing right now is telling me that all women are whiny, emotional, and have a tendency to freak out over the smallest of stuff. He might think that he’s complimenting me or telling me that I’m “cool,” but he’s just being a jerk. Whoa, sorry to freak out like that—I’m just super emotional right now.
  12. “You’re not like most girls.” Ah, the overarching theme of most of the comments above. Let’s just kill this notion once and for all. Just because I’m my own human being (shockingly enough, not all girls are made from the same cookie cutter mold) and not 100% like other women, doesn’t make me better than anyone. Most girls are amazing and probably out of the league of any man who makes this comment.