12 Ways You Know He Loves You When He Doesn’t Even Say It

Not everyone is the best at verbally expressing their affection. Even if your partner doesn’t actually SAY “I love you” a thousand times a day, it doesn’t mean he’s not feeling it. Here are 12 ways he shows you that he loves you even when the words don’t flow so freely.

  1. He pays attention. He remembers little things you’ve said during conversations. Nobody’s going to pay attention to the way you move your hands when you talk or that you absolutely love miniature bottles of perfume unless he’s crazy about you. When he remembers, it means he’s made you important to himself.
  2. He always sees the good in you. When you’re going through periods of negativity or that dreaded emotional slump before your period, he goes out of his way to talk you back to reality. He reminds you who you are and the awesome team you make together. He knows you in the deepest sense and always chooses to see the good in you, even when you’re not at your best.
  3. He makes sacrifices for you. You know he has a big deadline approaching, but he still takes out time to make your weekly Netflix and chill date. Whether he’s sacrificing his time, his money, or his manliness (he doesn’t have to watch “Bridget Jones’ Diary” with you, you know) without asking for anything in return, he puts your needs above his own.
  4. He forgives you. He doesn’t hold onto that time you didn’t answer your phone because you accidentally got piss-drunk on the beach with your BFF and spent all night puking. He understands that you’re a finite human, and he chooses to see you at your best. He lets you know that you’re forgiven, and he doesn’t hold grudges for your past mistakes.
  5. He makes your relationship a priority. Even though we’re all busy, he makes it known to you that he’s never too busy to invest in your love. He let’s you know that he’s thinking of you throughout the day, and he’s intentional about finding time for you to spend together.
  6. He knows how to stop a fight. Whenever you’re about to go crazy on him, he knows just what to say or do to calm you down enough so that you chill out. He’d rather you keep your connection than fight like cats and dogs, so he does whatever he can to keep the peace.
  7. He accepts your quirks. He loves those things about yourself that you can’t stand, like the clumsy way you trip over your words when socializing in groups or how you flake out at the most inopportune times. He never makes you feel silly or stupid, but always embraces your quirks and accepts you for who you are.
  8. He fights for your relationship. He fights to see you for who you really are, he fights to understand you when he really doesn’t get why you’re acting the way you are, and he fights to maintain openness and honesty within your relationship. Relationships aren’t easy, and your partner loves you if he’s willing to do whatever it takes to make sure you’re both happy.
  9.  He doesn’t keep score. He doesn’t have a mental scorecard tallying up all the times you didn’t say thank you or initiate sex. You know that whatever he gives, he expects nothing in return. He doesn’t sweat the small stuff and knows that relationships work best when you do things for each other because you want to rather than because you feel obligated.
  10.  He gives you space. It’s easy to be needy with your partner, but the truth is sometimes you just need to spend a bit of away from him. Whether it’s going out with the girls or taking a solo hike, spending time apart is healthy and important in a relationship. If you’re with someone who truly loves you, he understands this and allows you to take the time to take care of you.
  11. He’s vulnerable with you. Guys don’t exactly like to spill their guts. So when your S.O. is willing to delve into his deepest fears, hurts, or anxieties, you know you’ve created a space that’s safe for him. Nothing says “love” like a man who is willing to lay his head on your shoulder and let it all out.
  12. He consults you. Whenever he needs to make a decision, he consults you for your wisdom and guidance first. This shows you the place of importance you have in his life, and also that he trusts your intuition and say in the matter.
Lauren is a freelance writer living in New Jersey. When she's not deeply immersed in pondering the cosmos, you'll find her hiking a mountain, reading something philosophical, or dancing in her underwear. Read more of her existential musings at www.laurenvenn.com