It’s the least wonderful time of the year… at least when you’re a single girl. Sure, you’re excited for the holiday parties and the endless mulled wine, but you’re so sick and tired of answering the same old questions whenever you see your family. If you’re rolling solo this year, you’re likely dreading being asked these 13 questions:
- Do you have a boyfriend? No, but you’re super thankful for that lovely reminder. It’s not really that simple in 2016. You don’t want to go through all the reasons why (the ghosting, the bad dates, the dates that don’t even happen at all) but you do want to ask your relative why they think that boyfriends seem to grow on trees or something.
- Have you gone on any dates lately? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. It’s kind of a day by day, week by week thing. It’s also not the most fun and enjoyable topic to discuss, so it’s no wonder you don’t interrupt your family dinner to talk about your most recent crappy date. Anyway, why does it matter to them?
- Can I set you up? Oh really? Because set-ups always work so well? Sorry, but you’re not sure that you totally believe this. You don’t want to be set up. You can find your own dates, thanks very much. Just because you haven’t turned any of those dates into a boyfriend doesn’t mean that this isn’t true.
- Have you tried speed dating? Your answer is either yes, and it was a horror story or no, and you never want to. Speed dating is a notoriously awful time. Of course when you’re single, you try everything, but people have to realize that this doesn’t always work out for the best.
- Are you online dating? You’re definitely ready to scream and pull out your hair when you get asked this. Does your well-meaning yet totally annoying family member think that you’ve never, ever heard of online dating? Do they not get that it takes time to meet someone? Can everyone please just let you be?
- Have you heard of Tinder? Yup. Pretty hard to live in the world and not have heard of this. The next time someone asks you if you’re on it, you want to tell them to spend five minutes on the app. Then they can agree that it can be really frustrating and even creepy — in other words, not really somewhere you go looking for love.
- Have you tried Match.com? For whatever reason, this is always the website that people tell you about. They say their cousin/best friend/high school classmate/college roommate met their husband that way and now they’re married with kids and the whole deal. Good for them.
- Are you maybe being too picky? This kind of question is such a double-edged sword. On the one hand, you totally get that you shouldn’t be so picky that you never like anyone. On the other hand, you really don’t want to settle. This question basically makes you all kinds of pissed off and annoyed.
- Do you go on any good dates? For some reason, this is a really common question from family and family friends. It’s like they want to make themselves feel better instead of you by knowing that not every guy you meet is a nightmare. They want to believe that you’re at least enjoying being young and single and dating. Unfortunately, you rarely have good dates, and no, you’re not having any fun.
- Do you want to get married? Your answer to this question is almost irrelevant because it’s super annoying being asked this when you’re super single. And when this line of questioning has basically proved that. Sure, you might want to get married. But you’d love a BF first… which is the whole point of this conversation, right?
- Don’t you want kids? Your most irritating relatives will 100% ask you this question. It’s like you’re personally hurting or offending them by not procreating immediately. Sorry, but you would love to go on a decent first date before you even think about having kids.
- Do you get lonely? Yup, this is exactly what you want to be talking about when you’re gathered around a table eating turkey and sweet potato casserole, or when you’re drinking mulled wine on Christmas Eve. Awesome.
- Do you go for dinner or drinks? It’s weird, but people love to know what you actually do on your first dates. Maybe they’re trying to live vicariously or something, you’re not really sure. But they’re going to ask you this and you pretty much want to scream that it’s a) none of their business and b) it doesn’t make a difference what you do, you’ve still had bad luck. Sure, they might mean well, but you wish they would stop with the Q&A and focus on the holidays. You will figure your love life out on your own.