13 Subtle Behaviors of People Who Struggle with Self-Discipline and Control

13 Subtle Behaviors of People Who Struggle with Self-Discipline and Control

We all lose focus and slip up occasionally, but those who seesaws tend to exhibit habits that hint at deeper struggles with self-discipline. If you’ve ever wondered why some people can’t seem to stay on track, here are 13 subtle signs they might be wrestling with control issues.

1. They Have “Serial Starter” Syndrome

messy living

They’re that person who’s always diving into a new hobby or project, only to run out of steam faster than it started. It’s all about the thrill of the new—but the follow-through is missing. They’re all hype initially, but as soon as the novelty wears off, so does their commitment.

Tip: Stick to one or two things you’re genuinely into and see them through. There’s no need to chase every shiny thing.

2. They Swipe First, Think Later

Impulse buys are their second language. It might be shoes they’ll never wear or the newest gadget they don’t need; their card’s getting a workout. It’s not just about spending money; it’s about seeking instant gratification or trying to fill an emotional gap. Whether they’re stressed, bored, or unhappy, shopping becomes their quick fix, even if it leads to guilt and money issues later.

Tip: Next time you’re about to drop cash, give yourself 24 hours to think it over. Chances are, you’ll realize you don’t need it.

3. They’re Trapped in the Plan-Flake Cycle

They are that friend who constantly rearranges plans like their calendar is a never-ending puzzle. One day, it’s brunch; the next, it’s a “rain check.” It’s not just indecision—it’s FOMO mixed with commitment issues. They don’t want to miss out on anything, but in the end, they miss out on everything by overscheduling and then bailing.

Tip: Once you’ve made plans, lock them in. Less chaos, more chill.

4. They Give Off Serious Yes-Man Vibes

Saying “no” feels like a betrayal to these people. Whether it’s work, friends, or random obligations, they’re always saying “yes” even when it’s draining them dry. It looks generous on the outside but leads to major burnout on the inside—and all because they’re terrified of letting anyone down.

Tip: Learn to say “no” without feeling guilty. Your sanity will thank you.

5. They Dream Big, Plan Small

Ask them where they’ll be in five years, and you’ll get a blank stare or some vague, pie-in-the-sky answer. They want success but haven’t quite identified what that looks like or which path to take. Without real long-term goals, they’re floating, and distractions become their best friend.

Tip: Start small. Set tangible, achievable goals that will keep you on track.

6. They Activate Snack Attack Mode Often

They’re the ones who always have their hand in the chip bag during a Netflix binge. Emotional eating isn’t just about hunger—it’s about avoiding what’s really going on. Stress, boredom, or straight-up avoidance are masked by constant snacking, often leading to guilt afterward.

Tip: Pay attention to why you’re eating. If it’s not hunger, maybe it’s time to deal with the emotions instead.

7. They’re Distracted AF

They switch from task to task, never really finishing anything because something “more urgent” always pops up. They’re constantly overwhelmed and scattered, which only makes it harder for them to get anything done. It’s chaos in motion.

Tip: Turn off the noise, focus on one thing, and you’ll crush it faster than you think.

8. They’re Master Procrastinators

These people dodging responsibilities like it’s an Olympic sport. They’re masters of finding every excuse in the book to avoid the important stuff, from booking that doctor’s appointment to doing their taxes. It’s a temporary escape, but those deadlines always come knocking.

Tip: Break things down into bite-sized tasks so it doesn’t feel like a mountain you have to climb.

9. They Make the Same Mistakes, Different Day

If you’ve watched someone make the same relationship mistake again and again, you know what’s up. Without self-discipline, they’re on autopilot, repeating toxic patterns without realizing it. Until they get some insight, they’re doomed to rinse and repeat.

Tip: Take the time to reflect on where things went wrong and what you can learn from it.

10. They’re Caffeine and Sugar Junkies

If they’re always grabbing another coffee or soda, it’s not just a craving; it’s survival. They’re using caffeine and sugar as a crutch to power through the day, but the highs are short-lived, and the crashes are brutal.

Tip: Fuel your energy with real food and good sleep instead of relying on quick fixes.

11. They Hide Behind Multitasking

They’ll tell you they’re killing it at multitasking, but they’re juggling so much that nothing gets done right. It’s like being busy for the sake of being busy. They feel like they’ve accomplished nothing—and they’re probably right.

Tip: Do one thing at a time. Your productivity will thank you.

12. They’re Instant Gratification Addicts

Why wait when you can have it now is their mantra. Whether binge-watching shows or scrolling through social media when they should be working, these folks can’t delay gratification. Sure, it feels great in the moment, but long-term? Not so much.

Tip: Delay the short-term pleasure for a long-term win. Your future self will be stoked.

13. They Have Zero Self-Reflection

You might notice they never pause to think about their actions or choices. They’re stuck on repeat, not realizing their patterns sabotage their growth. They’ll never learn from their mistakes without a beat to reflect.

Tip: Take five minutes a day to check in with yourself. It can make all the difference.

Natasha is a seasoned lifestyle journalist and editor based in New York City. Originally from Sydney, during a a stellar two-decade career, she has reported on the latest lifestyle news and trends for major media brands including Elle and Grazia.