14 Mantras For Strong, Independent Women To Live By

When you gaze at your reflection in the mirror, what do you see? What are the thoughts inside your head? If your initial reaction is to criticize your appearance, an immediate change needs to be made. You should be your biggest fan. You wanna take on the world? Then say the following things each time you see your reflection:

  1. “I’m gonna slay this day.” You can’t control what will happen each day, but you can look yourself in the eye and get psyched up to kick all the ass. When you enter a room or situation with confidence, you win.
  2. “My belly is cute AF, especially when it’s holding tacos.” You don’t need a six-pack or even a two-pack to love your stomach. Soft, hard, hairy, tan – whatever it looks like, it’s beautiful. When you give your body the nourishment it needs to, ya know, go on living, it’s even better. Look at your belly after you just ate and appreciate the cuteness of your own taco/pizza/cookie holder.
  3. “I will not apologize for anything today.” This doesn’t mean act like a loser and refuse to make it right, but women apologize way more often than we need to. Get in the habit of not immediately apologizing because you don’t need to be sorry for taking up space, having opinions or existing in this world.
  4. “Look at these laugh lines… what a fun life I’ve had!” Laugh lines are an amazing aspect of aging. The fact that smiling and laughing too much over time creates lines in your face and they’re somehow perceived as something women should be ashamed of is hot nonsense. Wear them like a badge of honor. You’ve smiled a lot. You’ve laughed a lot. It’s a good thing.
  5. “If men feel intimidated by my confidence, that’s not my problem.” Some men have no idea what to do with confident women because if we don’t require their validation to love ourselves, how are men seen as useful in our eyes? It’s stupid, of course, but that stupidity is not your problem. They need to work out their own issues themselves. Meanwhile, keep being self-sufficient and confident AF.
  6. “My opinion is the only one that matters when it comes to my looks.” When someone calls you beautiful, it’s nice, but it shouldn’t change the way you see yourself. When someone calls you ugly, it’s a pathetic attempt at an insult and it doesn’t change the way you see yourself. People will always have opinions about how you look. Beauty is subjective, though, so literally none of those opinions matter.
  7. “My smile is unlike anyone else’s.” I have never seen two identical smiles. Your smile, no matter what it looks like, is unique and it lights up your face. Take some time in the mirror and appreciate every little sparkling detail. Only smile when you want to and not when a man tells you to, because ugh.
  8. “I will do my part to shut down misogyny.” The fight to smash all the glass ceilings is exhausting but so important. It’s a group effort, so we all need to be doing our part each day of creating an environment where women are earning the same as men for doing the same job. Remind your fellow fellas that reverse sexism doesn’t exist, that rape culture is a real thing that needs to end and women are far more than just babymakers.
  9. “I’m too badass to settle.” Don’t settle for anything less than you deserve. We’re already settling for so much as it is just by being women. Never forget that you deserve respect. You deserve to be treated like a queen by your partner. You deserve to be paid well for the hard work you put in. You deserve love no matter how many sexual partners you’ve had, how much you weigh and how many times a day you say the word “f*ck.”
  10. “It’s fun being inside my head. So many witty jokes.” If you can’t be entertained by your own mind, every moment you spend alone will be incredibly boring. Instead of thinking, I’m so awkward. I say such stupid things. I’m so dumb sometimes, instead think, Wow, I’m a goddamn delight. Once you learn to enjoy your own company, your standards for the company you keep will be raised accordingly.
  11. “What would Beyonce do?” Beyonce talks openly about how much she slays. Why shouldn’t you? She has been fearlessly vulnerable, a warrior when we needed one, and she has always been true to who she is. She’s basically the most majestic person who has ever lived, so… good role model.
  12. “I legit get better with age.” Like a fine wine, you’re getting stronger, smarter, and cooler every passing day. Aging is nothing to fear or to fight. It’s the most natural thing in the world, and it should be appreciated as such. With age, your wisdom increases, and better yet, your tolerance for BS decreases. It’s wonderful.
  13. “I’m gonna be exactly who I am but louder.”I don’t mean to get louder verbally. I mean change your posture, your body language, and your overall vibe to ensure that nobody who looks at you wonders if you love yourself or not. Just lifting your chin up an inch tells the world you are not to be underestimated.
  14. “I would date me.”If you wouldn’t date the hell out of yourself, how can you really expect anyone else to? Look at your face, your body, and your unbreakable spirit, and lovingly gaze at the treasure that you are.
is a freelance writer for Bustle and Petcha, and editor for Wise Bread. She suffers from separation anxiety, and can't bear to be away from her dog for more than 20 minutes. Her dog doesn't seem to care either way. Sweater season is her favorite season.