14 Signs You’re Finally Ready To Have Kids

You were adamant about never wanting to have kids and thought a hypothetical biological clock changing your mind was BS. But then you heard the most fabulous name or saw the perfect dress for your imaginary mini me and everything changed. Maybe there really is a ticking or maybe you have just been around enough babies now that they’ve actually won you over; either way, you’re starting to think it might not be the worst thing ever if you had a couple. Here are 14 signs you’re (maybe) finally ready to have kids:

  1. You no longer feel obligated to go out every Friday and Saturday night. You’ve already given up on the bar scene and have become quite the homebody as of late. Might as well add a few munchkins to the mix because there are only so many shows you can watch on Netflix… that is, until you start adding Disney movies to your queue.
  2. All of your friends are having kids. OK, so that’s been happening, but now you are actually happy for them. A few years ago, you felt like your besties becoming moms was ruining your life, but now you’re excited for their kids’ birthday parties and soccer games.
  3. You finally have some money. You’re no longer barely getting by and you can probably afford some diapers and formula now. A crib and stroller might be pushing it, but that’s what baby showers are for, right?
  4. You found someone worth having them with. It’s kind of hard to imagine having kids when you are still daydreaming about the person you would like to have them with. Once you’ve met someone who you know will make an amazing dad it’s a lot easier to picture it actually happening.
  5. Pictures of babies on Facebook no longer make you cringe. OK, so some of them still do, but at least now you can tolerate the cute ones. You don’t even mind seeing what they are doing every single minute of every single day, even if it is only spitting up on themselves and sleeping.
  6. You get jealous when you see a baby. You used to make fun of people who were having babies and think about how much their lives sucked, but now you’re kinda jealous you don’t have a little person crawling around that looks just like you.
  7. You have fantasized about grabbing a cute one when no one is looking and taking off. Sure, you’d never really do it, but if you have thought about “borrowing” someone’s little nugget when they weren’t looking, you’re probably ready for one of your own.
  8. You no longer want to kick crying kids on airplanes or in the grocery store. Don’t get it twisted, they still annoy the crap out of you, but you can now see past their tantrums at the sweet little children they can be.
  9. You actually volunteer to babysit. You used to require a stocked fridge, all the movie channels, and a major payout at the end of the night before you’d go anywhere near a kid, but now you’re willing to do it for free. Because, you know, it’s good practice.
  10. You catch yourself looking at cute baby outfits. Even though you have no baby gifts to buy at the moment, you can’t help but glimpsing at all of the adorable outfits with matching headbands you could buy.
  11. You no longer make up a million excuses to get out of going to a baby showerOK, so they’re definitely still kinda boring, but you’ve come to terms with the fact that this is what people your age are doing now. Besides, it’s like the only way you will ever to get to see like half of your friends these days…
  12. You’re always thinking about baby names. Whenever you hear a name you like, you write it down with its potential middle name, initials and nickname to see how it would work. Obviously any name that would have Jr. getting picked on on the playground is out as well as not so cute initials, i.e. B.O.
  13. Not drinking for 9 months doesn’t sound like the end of the world anymore. Giving up your daily glass (or three) of after work wine sounds totally awful, but you’re finally starting to realize that the sacrifice is worth the reward. Besides, they say a little wine now and then is totally fine.
  14. You’ve already accepted that the body you had at 18 is gone. Even though it only lasts nine months and parenthood lasts a lifetime, pregnancy is one of the most daunting things about having kids. Besides fearing the worst pain imaginable (the horror stories we’ve all heard about 30+ hour labors), most of us are also terrified of the toll it will take on our bodies. Stretching, sagging, tearing, and not being able to drop those last 15 lbs are way less scary once you realize your body has already been far from perfect for many years.
Rachael is an award winning stand-up comedienne, freelance writer, and BravoTV superfan. Her Real Housewives tagline is “The only thing bigger than my boobs are my personalities.” In her spare time, she keeps busy catering to the needs of a very spoiled Siberian Husky, (Paris Hilton), cleaning the skeletons out of her closet (to make room for more shoes), and swiping left to everyone on Tinder. Follow her on twitter @therealplandd.