Sex is wonderful and it’s certainly an intimacy builder in most cases but it’s not the end all be all. There are many more ways to experience intimacy with your partner. The options span from small to grand and they’re all wonderful ways to get a little closer to your sweetie.
- Share your fears Get super deep. Express your fears to one another. Share how you’re terrified that he’s cheating or that you’re really afraid that your coworkers hate you. Talking about your fears with one another can really humanize you, making you more accessible to your partner.
- Watch the stars together Take a stroll during the night and lay down in the grass to watch the stars together. You can even lay out a blanket. Gazing at the stars is a reminder of how small you are, but it helps you to appreciate what you have. It stirs up thoughts in your head about the bigger picture in life, drawing you closer to the one you love.
- Write each other letters Gather all of the thoughts that are in your head and pour them onto paper. Think about all the reasons you love and appreciate your partner, then write them down. Act as if it’s their last day on earth and you need to tell them everything you think about them (the good stuff). This activity is sure to sweep both of you off your feet.
- Practice gratitude Think about the things that you’re grateful for on a regular basis. There’s nothing quite like a grateful heart. This exercise reminds you of the positive things about your partner, which can be useful when you’re angry over a fight. It can diffuse what’s going on, sparking the love in your hearts for one another.
- Look at your love languages There are five different love languages. They’re helpful in figuring out what you and your partner’s needs are. For example, your language may be physical touch while your partners is words of affirmation. Figuring out exactly which one the two of you are will help you to communicate more effectively.
- Cook dinner together Have fun with this one! Not all suggestions for how to get intimate need to be super serious. Put your phones away and enjoy the process of creating a meal together. Be sure to laugh—that’s super important. Have patience with the process and watch as you and your partner grow closer.
- Cuddle There’s nothing quite like a great cuddle session. The feelings that arise when you’re all tangled up in another are wonderful. You may be accustomed to cuddles leading to sex, so it’ll be nice to just enjoy each other’s physical company without any expectation. Plus, the chemicals released in your brain from the physical touch are a huge bonus.
- Give each other massages Be careful to not get too sexual with this one. You two can pretend that you’re professionals giving each other massages, or you can just go for it. Remember how hard the other person works—try to work out the kinks from their hard work. Let your partner do the same for you. This is a great way to trust the other person and allow yourself to be cared for.
- Take a shower together This activity can be super intimate, but it doesn’t have to be sexual. Getting naked and allowing yourselves to be seen fully is a deeply vulnerable thing. Enjoy touching each other and just enjoy each other’s company. It’ll be totally worth it to see what happens when you don’t jump right to sex.
- Make out Pretend like it’s the very first time you’ve laid eyes on your partner. You think they’re sexy AF and want to jump their bones. Viciously making out can be a ton of fun and a good bonding experience.
- Have FaceTime sexy time When you two are apart, use technology to be sexual. Utilize FaceTime, Skype, or whatever video comes with your phone. One of you (or both) can do a striptease, enticing your partner. You could even get yourselves off in front of the other. This is a fun way to build excitement and anticipation.
- Play footsie Like I said, doing acts that stir up intimacy don’t always have to look like grand gestures. Imagine you’re out with some friends at a dinner and you feel your partner lovingly touching your feet. Doing it back is saying “hello” and “I love you.” It’s a cute way to remind each other that you love one another.
- Swap presents Presents aren’t just reserved for the holidays and birthdays. You two could have a random time when you swap gifts. They don’t have to be anything crazy, you can have a price limit. It’s sweet to see what your darling gets you, often showing you how well they know you.
- Hold hands Sometimes couples that have been dating forever stop holding hands so much. Well, I’m proposing that you grab the hands of the one you love. It is a subtle but significant way of bringing you two together. Do it in the grocery store or wherever you’re out. You won’t regret it.
