So, you’ve probably heard the term “narcissist” thrown around, but what does it really mean? These folks are all about themselves – their image, their achievements, their needs. They crave admiration and attention, and when their ego gets bruised, well, it’s not pretty. Here are some of the ways they might react when their fragile sense of self is threatened.
1. They go into denial.
The initial reaction of a narcissist to a bruised ego is often flat-out denial, Verywell Mind notes. They might refuse to acknowledge any wrongdoing, even if the evidence is staring them in the face. This can be infuriating to deal with, but it’s their way of protecting their fragile self-image. They’ll twist the narrative, blame other people, or simply pretend like nothing happened. They might even convince themselves that they’re the victim in the situation.
2. They launch a counterattack.
Sometimes, denial isn’t enough. When a narcissist feels threatened, they might go on the offensive. This could involve verbally attacking you, spreading rumors, or trying to sabotage your reputation. They’ll do whatever it takes to regain control and restore their sense of superiority. Be prepared for a barrage of insults, accusations, and even threats if you challenge their ego.
3. They try to get revenge.
Narcissists have a long memory when it comes to perceived slights. If you bruise their ego, they might not react right away. Instead, they’ll bide their time, waiting for the perfect opportunity to get back at you. This could involve anything from subtle digs and passive-aggressive comments to more overt acts of sabotage or revenge. Be wary of their anger; it can simmer beneath the surface for a long time.
4. They become excessively charming.
This might seem counterintuitive, but sometimes narcissists will ramp up the charm offensive after their ego takes a hit. They might shower you with compliments, gifts, or attention in an attempt to win back your favor. Don’t be fooled! This is just another manipulation tactic designed to regain control and restore their sense of importance.
5. They play the victim.
Narcissists are experts at playing the victim card. They’ll twist the narrative to make it seem like they’re the ones who have been wronged, even if they were clearly in the wrong. They might exaggerate their suffering, blame everyone else for their problems, or look for sympathy from anyone who will listen. It’s a way to deflect responsibility and regain control of the situation.
6. They withdraw and isolate themselves.
Sometimes, a narcissist will retreat into a shell when their ego is bruised. They might become withdrawn, moody, or even disappear for a while. This is their way of licking their wounds and regrouping. They might use this time to plot their revenge, or simply to avoid facing the reality of their own flaws and insecurities.
7. They become even more controlling.
A bruised ego can trigger a narcissist’s need for control. They might try to micromanage your life, dictate your choices, or become overly critical of your behavior. This is their way of reasserting their dominance and restoring their sense of power. It’s important to set boundaries and resist their attempts to control you.
8. They chase external validation.
Narcissists crave admiration and validation. When their ego is bruised, they might try to get attention from anyone and everyone to boost their self-esteem. This could involve anything from bragging about their accomplishments to flirting with strangers. They might even start new relationships or friendships to fill the void left by the perceived rejection.
9. They deflect and project.
When confronted with their own shortcomings, narcissists often deflect by pointing out your flaws instead. They might accuse you of being overly sensitive, selfish, or irrational. This projection is a defense mechanism to avoid looking inward and taking responsibility for their own behavior. It’s their way of turning the tables and making you feel like the problem, not them.
10. They try to undermine your credibility.
If you challenge a narcissist’s viewpoint or question their authority, they might try to destroy your reputation. They might make you doubt your own memory, twist your words, or even spread rumors about you to other people. This is their way of maintaining their power and control by making you seem unreliable or untrustworthy.
11. They play the blame game.
Nothing is ever a narcissist’s fault. They’ll blame you, their ex, their parents, their boss, or even the weather for their own mistakes and shortcomings. This blame-shifting is a way to avoid accountability and maintain their inflated sense of self-importance. They’ll even rewrite history to fit their narrative and convince themselves that they’re always the victim.
12. They become passive-aggressive.
When a narcissist’s ego is bruised, they might not confront you directly. Instead, they’ll resort to passive-aggressive tactics, like giving you the silent treatment, making snide remarks, or sabotaging your efforts. This is their way of expressing anger and resentment without directly acknowledging their own vulnerability.
13. They withdraw from relationships.
If a narcissist feels like they’re losing control or being challenged, they might withdraw from the relationship. They might become emotionally distant, stop communicating, or even ghost you completely, Psych Central explains. This is their way of protecting their fragile ego and avoiding any further confrontation.
14. They engage in self-destructive behaviors.
Sometimes, a bruised ego can trigger a spiral of self-destructive behavior in a narcissist. They might turn to drugs, alcohol, or other unhealthy coping mechanisms to numb their pain and avoid dealing with their emotions. They might also engage in risky behaviors or self-harm as a way to regain a sense of control or punish themselves for their perceived failure.
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