14 Thoughts You Have When You See Your Ex’s New Girlfriend For the First Time

It’s always right about the time that you think you’re over your ex when he starts showing up places with a new girl on his arm. Whether you’re actually over it or are totally lying to save face, seeing his new girl is just plain weird. How can you not draw comparisons and go into overanalyzing mode? Here are all the thoughts that go through your head when you see his new girl for the first time, as terrible as they may be.

  1. “Oh, damn.” It’s hard enough stumbling upon his boo’d up photos on Instagram, but running into your ex and his new girl in person together is enough to send a girl into literal shock.
  2. “She’s not as pretty as me.” Woohoo, he didn’t replace me with someone way better looking! But wait… did he think even think I was pretty? Does it even matter? I’m confused.
  3. “How the hell did he move on before me?” I’ve been dating-ish… or thinking about dating, at least. Where on earth did he already find someone that he’s actually comfortable calling his girlfriend? Rude.
  4. “I miss him.” Ow, there goes my appetite for the rest of the week. I swear I was over him, but all the sudden I feel like the breakup is happening all over again.
  5. “What does she have that I don’t?” I can’t tell what’s so great about her by looking at her, so she must have a way better personality than me. Cool. I’m never dating again.
  6. “I don’t miss him.” Whatever — he is such a jerk, and I deserve way better anyway. Don’t I? Wait, what if I don’t and that was my last chance at love because I’m cursed or something?
  7. “Do I have to talk to her?” We go to the same gym. Is there like some protocol for how to handle our run-ins? Half smile? Polite wave? Hugs? Maybe we should get drinks.
  8. “Wait, they have sex.” She’s probably not that great in bed. But what if she’s better? Is that why he had such an easy time forgetting me? Oh god. And ew.
  9. “She seems awesome.” Great — she’s super nice, awesome, beautiful, and can afford to travel the world with him like he’s always wanted. Hope they have fun.
  10. “OMG, it’s really over between us.” It’s not that I was holding out hope that he would come running back to me and beg for my love, but you know, I considered it.
  11. “Did I make the right decision dumping him?” Suddenly I can’t remember why we even broke up to begin with. Should I even be in charge of making my own decisions? Help!
  12. “Will this ever not be a thing?” Our relationship is over, so I can’t believe I still have to think about him at all. He’s more like an allergy to a peanut than getting over a cold.
  13. “They seem happy. I can be happy for them.” Totally. My new mantra is, “I am happy for my ex, because I am a good person.” I’m just gonna repeat that about 430 times a day and I should be good.
  14. “If he can do it, so can I.” Technically if he can move on, then it’s possible that I can meet and actually be happy with an entirely new person, too. Whoa.
Kate Ferguson is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blog and magazine genres. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce. Look for article links, updates, (and the occasional joke) on Twitter @KateFerg or @WriterKateFerg, or check out her personal blog ThatsRandomKate.blogspot.com
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