15 Signs Your Date Is Going To Ghost You

Whether it’s the first date or you’ve been seeing each other on the regular for a while, it’s sad to say that many guys don’t really have what it takes to break it off with a girl properly. If you want to save time and effort, it’s best to beat them to the punch or at least call them out on it. Not sure whether he’s going to ghost? Look out for these signs:

  1. When he actually shows up to your first date, he looks like he wants to bolt. If he looks like he really doesn’t want to be there, or like he’s seriously disappointed, he’s probably already looking for a way out. Don’t bother ordering food here, just tell him to leave. It’s better to cut things short than to add a tab.
  2. His usual missives start turning into one-word texts. This means that he’s probably going to stop talking altogether soon. It’s a classic sign of disinterest.
  3. When you ask when you’re going to meet up, he gives vague answers. This is a sign that he’s not really looking to meet up anytime soon. Most guys will jump on the opportunity to go on a date faster than you can actually text the phrase, “Netflix and chill?”
  4. He has a wishy-washy personality. Is it hard to get a straight answer from him? Does he seem to be the kind of guy who’s afraid to upset people? If so, this is the kind of guy who will ghost because of the fact that he can’t stand conflict. Guys who are spineless are guys who ghost. If you want to avoid getting ghosted, stop talking to weak men.
  5. The guy in question is known for ghosting. If he has a reputation for doing something, you shouldn’t be shocked when he does it. This goes for cheating, too.
  6. All you guys do is have sex, or all he ever talks about is sex. Guys who don’t see you as relationship material are more likely to ghost. This is because they don’t respect you enough to tell you what the real deal is. If 90 percent of your dates are sex-oriented, you’re not his almost-girlfriend — you’re the girl he’s going to ghost when he finds someone he’s interested in.
  7. He keeps mentioning how he’s “super busy.” When a guy is interested in you, he’ll make time to see you. If he’s constantly making excuses to cut things short or to avoid meeting you, then he’s looking to have a graceful exit strategy. If you hear him talking about how busy he is, just let him go. It’s not worth it.
  8. He’s quick to bash relationships. The minute that you hear a date talk about how he’s “not looking for something serious,” he’s shown you his true colors. When he starts talking about keeping his freedom or discussing the merits of staying single, it’s time to bail. This just means that he’s not looking for a relationship with you.
  9. It’s all about him. A guy who’s always talking about what he wants is a person who really doesn’t care what happens to the people around him. Don’t expect him to extend the courtesy of breaking up like a real man.
  10. He’s really unnaturally charming. Does it seem like he knows exactly what to say and when to say it? A guy who seems like he’s born with a silver tongue often has ulterior motives in the dating world. Don’t be fooled by this slippery charmer — he’s just looking for a quick play.
  11. You get radio silence when you try to talk about future plans. When you can’t get an answer about your future plans together, it’s because the guy you’re seeing doesn’t have plans to keep you in his future. If this happens to you, expect him to bail soon.
  12. You might have acted a little nuts. Guys also ghost when they’re worried about a partner not taking the news that they’re not interested very well. If you did something along the lines of talking about babies on the first date, you can’t blame the dude for wanting to ghost.
  13. It seems like he’s looking at other options. If he’s the type to fully scan his options, there is a chance that he’ll ghost you. Ghosting is the way a lot of dumbasses put you on the back burner until they’ve made a decision, and screw that.
  14. You had sex for the first time after waiting for a bit, and now texts are sparse. This is a sign that the guy you dated was a cad. He got what he wanted, and now he’s gone. This is a dick move, but it’s all too common, unfortunately.
  15. He’s immature and a loser. Simply put, ghosting is one of those things that only guys who aren’t really relationship-worthy do. It’s a sign that he’s weak, a loser and that he can’t man up to handle a “big boy” talk. If you go on a date with the gut feeling that he’s a loser, you should expect him to pull something like this. At least you’re not losing anything important when he does it.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a New Jersey based writer and editor with bylines in Mashed, Newsbreak, Good Men Project, YourTango, and many more. She’s also the author of a safe travel guide for LGBTQIA+ people available on Amazon.

She regularly writes on her popular Medium page and posts on TikTok and Instagram @ossianamakescontent.