There are very few mistakes a woman can make that are worse for her in the long run than sleeping with a guy who has immature views on sex. He won’t be able to handle a relationship, sex itself, or emotions that may arise post-coitus. In other words, if you have sex with a guy who isn’t mentally ready for it, you’re going to regret it. Don’t hook up with a guy who does any of these things:
- He can’t tolerate a girl who’s had more sexual partners than him. It means he’s way too insecure to handle you. A person’s number is just that — a number. It doesn’t make you a bad person if you’ve slept with more people, just like it doesn’t make you a good person if you’re a virgin. If he fails to see this, then sex will most likely end with him slut-shaming you and boasting about his conquest. Is that kind of fallout really worth it?
- He gets annoyed or pushy if you tell him you’re not comfortable with a certain act. Don’t reward a guy’s bad behavior by giving in just to shut him up. Technically, if guys try to manipulate you into sleeping with them, that’s a form of sexual assault. If you notice him getting pushy or acting like you’re in the wrong for taking things slowly, RUN.
- He expects sex to be exactly like in sex movies. Online sex and real sex are two completely different animals. Women don’t look like sex stars, nor do they randomly start peeing when they orgasm. Many women can’t handle rough sex, and most men aren’t packing a 10 incher. If he expects sex to be like something out of a Brazzers film, chances are that he’s very inexperienced and also very unrealistic about what it’s supposed to be like.
- You’ve heard him boasting about his conquests before. A guy who boasts about his bedroom antics generally isn’t as experienced as he says he is. The fact that he feels a need to brag about it suggests he hasn’t matured past high school, either.
- You’ve seen him lash out at girls who reject him, or you’ve seen him play the “Nice Guy” card. This is a sign that the guy in question is about as mature as a toddler when it comes to women, sex, and anything dating-related. If he can’t avoid throwing a tantrum because a girl rejected him, there’s absolutely no way that he can handle more complicated issues about sex.
- He can’t have the sex talk with you. If he can’t discuss things like protection, hard limits, or other issues, then he probably isn’t as mature as you hope he is.
- He’s a deadbeat dad. If he can’t handle the fallout of an accidental pregnancy, or if he views it as “not his problem,” then you should never, ever have sex with him. This is a man who’s not mature enough to deal with problems that can arise, and he’s also a man who’s too selfish to care about anyone but himself. Should you sleep with him and get knocked up, you can safely assume he’ll never be there for you, either.
- He giggles like an idiot if you say the word “vagina.” This should have ended in middle school.
- It’s always about him. A man who’s too self-centered to understand your needs and feelings on subjects outside of sex should never be a man you sleep with. Sex is a give and take, and if he thinks that the only objective is to get himself off, it’s not even going to be that pleasant a fling.
- Any effort he puts in is minimal at best. If he expects you to drive to his place, do all the work in bed, and be on call at the drop of a hat, he needs to get a reality check before he gets laid. Even in a FWB situation, this kind of behavior is not acceptable. He has to meet you halfway, even if it’s just a fling.
- His game is garbage. If he comes off like a creep, he’s probably not emotionally mature enough to deal with actually getting laid. As a general rule, the more aggressive and manipulative a guy is when he’s flirting, the less mature he is about something as serious as sex.
- He body shames, slut shames, or makeup shames. Women come in different sizes, shapes, and styles. If he can’t understand this, and can’t accept this, it’s a clear sign that he’s immature.
- He can’t confront problems. A guy who can’t give a direct answer to an uncomfortable question isn’t someone you want to get involved with. If something like a broken condom happens, or if you do something that makes him uncomfortable, he won’t be able to handle it in a mature way.
- You get the distinct feeling that he sees you as an object. Any person who sees another person as an object isn’t going to be mature. Men want to have sex with a person. Boys want to have sex with a living, breathing sex toy.
- He sends penis pics. Don’t encourage him, girls. Do not engage with a guy who does this. Eventually, he’ll probably stop.
