15 Signs You Care Way Too Much About Sex

Sex is an important part of any healthy relationship. It’s how we know that someone desires us, and it’s a special bond that you only share with your partner. It also can be one of the key elements that leads you into doing absolutely idiotic things in the hopes of getting laid. There’s a point where sex needs to stop being a priority, and if you relate to any of the following, you might be at that point already:

  1. You’ve dated guys just because the sex was good. Guys are known for thinking with their other head, but the truth is that girls do this, too. If you’re choosing partners based on who gets you off, you might want to take a step back and re-evaluate your standards.
  2. You’ve cheated on legitimately good relationships just because you’re horny or need validation from others. Sadly, this is common from both men and women. In the pursuit of a quick thrill, many good relationships get ripped apart. If you’ve done this, you’re being selfish and you need to break up. An actual relationship is not a wise choice until you get your sex needs under control.
  3. You’ve stayed in terrible relationships just because the sex was good. You can get great sex elsewhere. Stop making it such a priority — especially with a guy who doesn’t deserve you.
  4. You’ve been turned down for being too sexually aggressive. If you keep hearing this from a lot of people, it might be because you are a bit too focused on sex as a whole. Being too focused on something will often cause people to get nervous about giving it to you, so this can quickly turn into a downward spiral.
  5. You flip out if you don’t get laid at least once a week. This is not a good sign. In fact, it might be a sign that you’re a sex addict — or that you have a hormonal issue.
  6. People have told you to get help. This might be a sign that you are doing something seriously risky, and that you are not admitting to yourself how bad things are getting.
  7. You’ve actually put yourself in seriously dangerous situations just because you needed to have sex. If you rarely use a condom, have had totally unprotected sex, or have met up with sketchy characters to do the deed, you might have sex a little bit too much on the mind. You might want to stop this behavior before you get hurt — or hurt someone else.
  8. You can rattle off your boyfriend’s sex stats, but can’t recall his favorite TV show or band. Yeah, if this happens, you aren’t dating that guy for his personality.
  9. You’re somewhat obsessed with talking about penis size with people. To be fair, this isn’t too bad as long as you aren’t completely annihilating some poor guy’s self worth. However, it’s still a sign that you might be a tad bit obsessed with sex.
  10. To a point, you can’t understand the purpose of monogamy. You can’t understand why someone would choose to close themselves off to all the other sex  prospects out there, because you couldn’t deal with it. This might be a sign that you’re naturally polygamous, or just a little sex-crazed.
  11. You’re on a first name basis with your local sex shop’s staff. Awkward much?
  12. Vibrator motors burn out on a regular basis after you use them. I feel your pain, but this is a sign that you might have a higher than normal sex drive at the very least. (You’d think they’d make those things a little sturdier, right?)
  13. You can’t have an orgasm without a specific fetish being fulfilled. This is problematic, to say the least. If this is happening to you, know that your dating life will be controlled by this fetish. It may be time to seek counseling or find a way to have a normal sex life.
  14. More than one partner has accused you of using them for their body. If this is a common theme in your dating life, you might want to think things over.
  15. You know, deep down, that sex is a bit too high on the priority ladder. This is a good indicator. Listen to your gut.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a New Jersey based writer and editor with bylines in Mashed, Newsbreak, Good Men Project, YourTango, and many more. She’s also the author of a safe travel guide for LGBTQIA+ people available on Amazon.

She regularly writes on her popular Medium page and posts on TikTok and Instagram @ossianamakescontent.