15 Ways Your Real Life Is Like ‘The Bachelorette’

It can’t all be fantasy suites and roses, just because it seems that way on TV. While it’s unlikely that you’ll ever have 25 guys lining up to compete for your love in front of a camera for the world to see, The Bachelorette dos sometimes resemble real life in more than a few strange ways. Admit it – you’ve related to the show a bit too much, too.

  1. There are 25 women for every 1 guy. It doesn’t matter where you go, there always seems to be one eligible bachelor in the room for every 25 women, so good luck getting a word with him.
  2. Falling in love is a competition. Thanks to apps like Tinder, men have an endless supply of options, and each one is prettier (and bustier) than the next.
  3. You got too drunk at the party. There’s always that one contestant who took too much advantage of the open bar and made an ass out of herself. Sure you were the life of the party, but he never wants to see you again.
  4. You cried. About everything and nothing all at once, but that’s all he will remember about your date.
  5. You are “here for the right reasons”. Sure, your quest for love is legit, but telling everyone you know, “I’m a nice girl” and “I’m just looking for love”, kind of makes you sound less so.
  6. You fall in love overnight. You met yesterday and already you are planning your future together. You not-so-secretly hope he proposes in the next 8 weeks. On a tropical island. In front of millions of people.
  7. Cameras are documenting your every move. Okay, so you don’t actually have a camera crew following you around, but there sure are a lot of iPhones and selfie sticks.
  8. The guy you’re dating is dating 10 other women, but you’re only dating him. He is openly dating other women and while it is destroying you, you like him too much to walk away. You would absolutely never consider dating other people as well, because you just aren’t wired that way.
  9. You really just want him to meet your family. You know if you can just get him to your hometown to meet your parents, the chances of you ending up together are so good.
  10. You would be willing to move to a farm in Iowa. Or anywhere in the world, if it meant you could finally change your relationship status.
  11. He knows how you feel about him but he can’t tell you how he feels. Or he just doesn’t want to because he is a guy and they kind of suck when it comes to talking about their feelings. There is no Chris Harrison or a production contract forbidding him to tell you, you are the one, just his annoying man genes.
  12. Group dates. Luckily for you, it’s probably just a bunch of his annoying friends and not the other women that he is currently sleeping/planning on sleeping with.
  13. The guy you want likes with the wrong woman. And so obviously, you should warn him, even though this just looks desperate and jealous on your part.
  14. All of your dates involve helicopter rides. You wish!
  15. It’s over before it really even started. As soon as you publicly announce (Facebook) your relationship, it’s over before people can even “like” it.
Rachael is an award winning stand-up comedienne, freelance writer, and BravoTV superfan. Her Real Housewives tagline is “The only thing bigger than my boobs are my personalities.” In her spare time, she keeps busy catering to the needs of a very spoiled Siberian Husky, (Paris Hilton), cleaning the skeletons out of her closet (to make room for more shoes), and swiping left to everyone on Tinder. Follow her on twitter @therealplandd.