Some of our daily habits are rooted in feelings of insecurity or self-doubt. These behaviors can hold you back in life, relationships, and careers. Here are 16 bad habits caused by low self-esteem—and how they might affect you without you realizing it.
1. Over-Explaining Yourself
It could be a sign of low self-esteem if you constantly explain your decisions, actions, or even opinions in detail—especially when it’s unnecessary. Overexplaining stems from a fear of being misunderstood or judged. It’s a way of seeking approval or trying to convince everyone you’re “right” because, deep down, you might not trust that your choices are valid. Trusting yourself means knowing your word is enough.
2. Overloading Your Schedule
Taking on too many responsibilities might seem like a sign of productivity, but it can be a symptom of low self-esteem. If you constantly overload yourself with tasks, projects, or commitments, it might be because you’re trying to prove your worth through busyness. This habit can stem from a fear of being seen as lazy or inadequate, often leading to burnout and stress without the validation you seek.
3. Apologizing When You Did Nothing Wrong
It might be a sign of low self-esteem if you find yourself apologizing for things that aren’t even your fault. Over-apologizing comes from a fear of bothering people or feeling like you’re always in the way. It stems from the belief that you’re a burden, even when you’re not. This habit can make you seem insecure and diminish your confidence, especially in professional and personal situations.
4. Brushing Off Any Recognition
People with low self-esteem often feel they don’t deserve recognition, even when they’ve worked hard. By deflecting praise, you’re reinforcing that you’re not good enough. It’s a habit that can stunt your self-growth and prevent you from fully owning your success. Learning to accept compliments can be a big step in building confidence.
5. Desperately Needing an Ego Boost
If you’re always seeking approval from others, it’s a clear sign of low self-esteem. Whether at work, in relationships, or even on social media, the need for validation stems from insecurity. You’re relying on external sources to feel good about yourself, which means your confidence is always at the mercy of others. Building inner confidence starts with learning to validate yourself rather than waiting for others.
6. Extreme People-Pleasing
Saying “yes” to everyone and everything—even when you don’t want to—is a classic sign of low self-esteem. People-pleasers are often afraid of conflict, rejection, or not being liked. The habit of putting others’ needs before your own can leave you feeling drained and unappreciated. It’s a vicious cycle that feeds feelings of worthlessness. Learning to say “no” and set boundaries can help break this pattern.
7. Talking Badly to Yourself
We all have an inner voice, but that voice can be relentlessly critical for people with low self-esteem. If you often catch yourself thinking things like “I’m not good enough,” “I always mess things up,” or “I’m such an idiot,” that’s low self-esteem talking. Negative self-talk can become a bad habit that erodes your confidence over time, making it harder to believe in your abilities and potential.
8. Comparing Yourself to Friends (And Strangers)
Scrolling through social media and comparing your life to someone else’s is a fast track to feeling inadequate. People with low self-esteem often measure their self-worth against others, constantly feeling like they don’t measure up. This habit is destructive because there’s always someone who seems to be doing better, leaving you feeling worse. Breaking the comparison cycle can help you focus on your journey and progress.
9. Overthinking Everything
Low self-esteem can make you second-guess every decision, leading to overthinking and indecision. You might worry about what others think or fear making mistakes, which keeps you in a loop of doubt. Overthinking can paralyze you, preventing you from moving forward in life. Recognizing that perfection isn’t necessary—and that mistakes are part of growth—can help ease the burden of over-analysis.
10. Putting Things Off for Another Day
Procrastination isn’t always about laziness—it’s often linked to low self-esteem. If you don’t believe in your abilities, you might put off tasks because you fear failing or not doing them perfectly. This habit keeps you stuck in a cycle of avoidance, feeding into your feelings of inadequacy. Tackling tasks head-on, even if you’re not feeling 100% confident, is a way to build productivity and self-esteem.
11. Staying in the Safe Lane
Low self-esteem could be the culprit if you constantly shy away from new opportunities or challenges. Fear of failure or not being “good enough” can hold you back from trying new things or stepping out of your comfort zone. This habit keeps you in a safe but stagnant place. Pushing yourself to embrace challenges—even small ones—can help build confidence and show you just how capable you are.
12. Staying in Toxic Relationships
People with low self-esteem often stay in toxic or unhealthy relationships because they don’t believe they deserve better. You might tolerate disrespect, neglect, or even abuse because, deep down, you think it’s the best you can get. This habit of settling for less is damaging and keeps you from experiencing true happiness and connection. Breaking free from toxic relationships can open the door to healthier, more fulfilling ones.
13. Being Super Sensitive to Criticism
Do you avoid taking risks or trying new things because you fear criticism? Low self-esteem makes criticism feel like a personal attack rather than constructive feedback. This fear can keep you stuck in a bubble of safety, never reaching your full potential. Taking criticism in stride—a tool for growth, not a judgment of your worth—can help you build resilience and self-confidence.
14. Burying Your Feelings
If you regularly minimize your feelings, telling yourself, “It’s not a big deal,” or “I shouldn’t feel this way,” low self-esteem might be to blame. This habit of dismissing your emotions often comes from a belief that your feelings aren’t valid or important. Over time, this can lead to emotional burnout and frustration. Honoring your feelings, instead of downplaying them, is essential for mental and emotional well-being.
15. Seeking Validation of Your Ideas
If you’re always asking others if you made the right decision or if you’re good enough, that’s a sign of low self-esteem. The need for constant reassurance stems from self-doubt and insecurity. It’s a habit that can be draining for you and the people around you. Building your confidence by trusting your judgment—and learning to be okay with occasional mistakes—can help you break free from this cycle.
16. Trying to be Perfect at Everything
Perfectionism often hides behind the mask of “high standards,” but it’s usually rooted in low self-esteem. If you feel like nothing you do is ever good enough or you’re terrified of making mistakes, it’s likely because you fear being judged or failing. This habit can lead to burnout, stress, and constant inadequacy. Letting go of the need to be perfect and embracing imperfection can be incredibly freeing.
17. Settling for Less in Your Career
Ever notice you avoid applying for jobs you’re fully qualified for or turn down opportunities for advancement? Low self-esteem often makes people settle for less in their careers because they don’t believe they deserve more. You might convince yourself you’re not good enough for that promotion or new job, keeping yourself stuck in roles where your talents are underutilized and undervalued.
