While mature adults subscribe to the “live and let live” mantra, there are plenty of people out there who have something to say about everything about everyone around them, even when it has absolutely nothing to do with them. If you’ve ever found yourself on the receiving end of jibes from someone who loves to criticize everything you do, here are some replies you might throw back at them.
1. “Thanks for your feedback.”
You’re not really thanking them, obviously, but you are being diplomatic about it, which keeps the situation from becoming any more heated, keeps you from exploding entirely, and lets you take the high road. This might (hopefully) be enough to shut down the conversation entirely — if they know what’s good for them.
2. “I’ll take that into consideration.”
This is a great follow-up from the above and you might use them together. Hey, some criticism is actually constructive, so there may be some good stuff lurking beneath all the insulting crap they’re throwing your way. In this case, telling them that you’ll actually reflect on that part is a good way to go.
3. “I’m comfortable with my choices.”
This lets the criticizer know that nothing they say is going to convince you to change your way of doing things. It also lets them know that you’re confident enough not to be so easily swayed by insulting “feedback” you never even asked for. Nice try, buddy.
4. “Is there a reason you feel the need to comment on everything I do?”
Sometimes you have to confront people like this directly. They may think they’re being slick with their criticisms, but by turning the tables back on them, you make it clear that you know exactly what they’re doing and you’re not having it. By forcing them to confront their own behavior, it might prompt them to change it (but don’t hold your breath).
5. “Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I just don’t agree with yours.”
Again, you’re being pretty diplomatic here by not invalidating them straight off the bat even if it would be completely appropriate for you to do so. This lets them know that you accept that they’re allowed to think and feel how they want but that you don’t have to change your own approach as a result.
6. “You seem to have a lot of opinions on my life. How’s yours going?”
Ain’t it always the way that the people who have the most to say about you and your life are the ones who don’t have their own act together? Throw this at them to point out that they need to be focusing their energy on their own affairs rather than having so many opinions on yours.
7. “I’ll keep doing me, and you keep doing you.”
Again, this is very zen of you — instead of really giving them a piece of your mind (which you would quite happily do), you’re basically being like, “Hey, let’s just agree to disagree here.” If you manage to say this in the face of someone who basically annihilates your entire life, you’re a better person than I.
8. “Interesting perspective, but I’m happy with the way things are.”
You have to throw in a bit of a sarcastic tone for this one, because nine times out of 10, their perspective is anything but interesting. It’s cruel, uninformed, ridiculous, and really annoying. However, telling them that is only going to result in a huge fight, so you can keep things chill with this reply instead.
9. “It seems like you’re more bothered by this than I am.”
This comeback points out that they seem to be more affected by your actions or decisions than you are, which is pretty sad, if you think about it. Why are they getting so bent out of shape over something that literally has nothing to do with them or their life? Sounds kinda pitiful, to be honest.
10. “I didn’t realize you were an expert on my life.”
Again, this is a sassy one, but sometimes it’s warranted. Chances are, this person knows nothing about where you’ve been and what you’ve been through, but that hasn’t stopped them from flapping their gums about your life. Point out how inappropriate that is — they need to know.
11. “I appreciate your concern, but I’m happy with my choices.”
Look, if the criticism really is based in concern — say, for instance, it comes from your mom or grandpa or something — that doesn’t mean it’s not toxic, but it does mean it’s not totally nefarious. That’s when a response like this might come in handy. You can stay respectful but also say your piece.
12. “We’ll have to agree to disagree.”
This classic comeback highlights that it’s okay to have differing opinions. There’s really nothing more to say here. You’re never going to talk each other around to see things from the other person’s POV, and that’s going to have to be okay.
13. “I see things differently, but that’s okay.”
I mean, of course it’s okay — you’re allowed to have your own feelings and perspective about your own life. It’s them who doesn’t have the right to put their two cents in all the time. Still, you want to be the bigger person, so something like this is worth trying.
14. “That’s one way to look at it.”
Again, a bit sarcastic and saucy, but sometimes needs must. Chances are, what they have to say is totally off-base and not at all applicable to your life, but telling them that isn’t going to do you any good. However, you still want to point out that they’re annoying without actually saying that, so this is a good option.
15. “It’s a good thing I’m living my life and not yours.”
Uh oh! Check you out! Sure, this seems a little like something you’d say in elementary school to a classmate you were fighting with, but that doesn’t make it any less valuable of a comeback when you’re an adult dealing with someone who’s basically trying to bully you into feeling bad about yourself.
16. “I value your opinion, but this is what works for me.”
Yep! You shouldn’t even have to say this, that’s how obvious it is, but some people are clueless and you have to point out what’s blatantly clear to everyone else to them. Leave it at that and don’t waste any more of your breath.
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