16 Damaging Effects Of Emotional Abuse

16 Damaging Effects Of Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse leaves scars that can’t be seen, but they run deep. It’s a silent torment that chips away at your self-worth, leaving you feeling broken and lost. If you’ve experienced this kind of pain, you’re not alone. Here are just some of the damaging effects of emotional abuse and how they can impact your life.

1. You struggle with low self-esteem.

Emotional abuse is like a constant drip of negativity, destroying your confidence and self-worth bit by bit. The abuser’s words and actions, like insults, put-downs, and manipulation, make you question your value and abilities. According to Psych Central, this can lead to a deep-seated feeling of inadequacy and self-doubt that can be difficult to shake.

2. You experience anxiety and depression.

sad woman blonde hair on couch

The constant emotional turmoil of abuse can take a heavy toll on your mental health. The fear of further attacks, the self-blame, and the feelings of helplessness can trigger or worsen anxiety and depression. You might find yourself feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, and unable to enjoy things you once loved.

3. You can’t bring yourself to trust anyone.

Above view of depressed man, lying in bed and staring. Sad tired male waking up late in morning before starting the day early. Stressed exhausted young guy thinking about problems and difficulties

Emotional abuse shatters your trust in the abuser and can extend to other relationships as well. You might become wary of people’s intentions, fear getting close to people, or struggle to believe that anyone truly cares about you. This can lead to isolation and difficulty forming healthy, fulfilling connections.

4. You blame yourself for the abuse.

sad blonde woman in living room

Abusers often manipulate their victims into believing that they deserve the mistreatment. They might blame you for their behavior, twist your words, or gaslight you into questioning your own sanity. This can lead to internalizing the blame and feeling responsible for the abuse, even though it’s never your fault.

5. You develop unhealthy coping mechanisms.

To cope with the pain and trauma of emotional abuse, you might turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms. This could include substance abuse, self-harm, eating disorders, or other destructive behaviors. These coping mechanisms might provide temporary relief, but they ultimately worsen the problem and can lead to further harm.

6. You have trouble setting boundaries.

Emotional abuse can make it difficult to assert your needs and set boundaries. You might be afraid of upsetting the abuser or triggering their anger, so you go along with their demands, even if they’re unreasonable. This can lead to feeling trapped and powerless in the relationship.

7. You experience physical health problems.

depressed woman sitting on her bed

The stress and trauma of emotional abuse can manifest in physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, fatigue, and insomnia. Chronic stress can also weaken your immune system, making you more susceptible to illness. Emotional abuse can have a serious impact on your overall well-being, both mentally and physically.

8. You feel isolated and alone.

Emotional abuse can make you feel like you’re all alone in your pain. The abuser might isolate you from your friends and family, making it difficult to reach out for support. Even if you have people around you, you might feel ashamed or embarrassed to talk about what you’re going through, leading to feelings of loneliness and isolation.

9. You struggle with decision-making.

depressed young woman in living room

Emotional abuse can kill your confidence in your own judgment and ability to make decisions. The abuser might have constantly criticized your choices, belittled your opinions, or made you feel like you’re incapable of thinking for yourself. This can lead to a crippling indecisiveness and fear of making the wrong choice.

10. You have nightmares and flashbacks.

serious woman sitting cross-legged on couch

The trauma of emotional abuse can linger in your mind, haunting you even in your sleep. You might experience nightmares or flashbacks of the abuse, reliving the painful moments and triggering intense emotions like fear, anger, and sadness. These intrusive thoughts can disrupt your sleep, affect your daily life, and make it difficult to move on.

11. You develop a negative self-image.

Emotional abuse can distort your perception of yourself. The constant criticism, insults, and put-downs can make you internalize a negative self-image. You might see yourself as unworthy, unlovable, or fundamentally flawed. This negative self-image can impact your relationships, career, and overall well-being.

12. You experience emotional numbness.

Young unhappy woman sitting on bed at home, waking up depressed, suffering from depression, feeling sad and miserable. Female suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder. Women and mental health

To protect yourself from the overwhelming pain of emotional abuse, you might shut down emotionally. You might feel numb, detached, or unable to experience joy or pleasure. This emotional numbness can make it difficult to connect with people, enjoy life, and heal from the trauma.

13. You have difficulty concentrating and focusing.

Lonely young woman feeling alone and negative emotion

The constant stress and anxiety caused by emotional abuse can take a toll on your cognitive function. You might find it difficult to concentrate, focus on tasks, or remember things. This can affect your work, school, and daily life, making it harder to function effectively.

14. You experience panic attacks.

upset man with wine bottles

The emotional triggers associated with the abuse can sometimes lead to panic attacks. These sudden episodes of intense fear and anxiety can be debilitating, causing physical symptoms like rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, and dizziness. Panic attacks can be terrifying and further contribute to the trauma.

15. You develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

depressed woman in her bedroom

Emotional abuse is a traumatic experience, and it can lead to the development of PTSD. Symptoms of PTSD can include flashbacks, nightmares, hypervigilance, emotional numbness, and difficulty sleeping, Medical News Today explains. PTSD can significantly impact your quality of life and require professional treatment.

16. You lose your sense of self.

sad young woman outdoors in city

Perhaps the most devastating effect of emotional abuse is the loss of your sense of self. The constant manipulation, gaslighting, and invalidation can make you question your own identity, values, and beliefs. You might feel like you’ve lost yourself in the relationship and don’t know who you are anymore. This can be a long and difficult journey to recover from, but it’s possible to reclaim your identity and rebuild your life.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.