180-Dating May Be Just What You Need To Revamp Your Love Life After Too Many Bad Experiences

To say that the dating scene is tough seems like the understatement of the century. For anyone wanting to find love and eventually settle down, it’s a real struggle. This is made even worse when you meet someone you like, only for things to go down in flames before you ever really get anywhere. That’s why 180-dating may be just the thing you need to switch things up and get your dating mojo back on track.

What is 180-dating?

You’ve probably been dating long enough at this point that you know what you want. You have your type on paper. You know the qualities your prospective partner will have and the things you need in a relationship to be happy. Or at least you think you do. Sadly, it’s been hard to find someone who ticks all the boxes on your list. Worse than that, the few people who have come along and seemed like a good fit still didn’t last. Could it be that you’ve been looking for the wrong thing all along?

This is why 180-dating is so revolutionary. It means turning your usual type on its head and going with the complete and total opposite. Take Kim Kardashian, for instance. She got divorced from rapper Kanye West and her next relationship was with his polar opposite, Pete Davidson. And while Kim and Pete didn’t last forever, they seem to have remained on good terms, and the relationship restored Kim’s confidence as well as her faith in love. So, what was the big difference in Davidson? He’s 13 years younger.

In essence, the magic of 180-dating is about rejuvenating your sense of excitement and wonder about dating. It’s hard to do that when you’re with someone your own age who likely has all the same baggage and is therefore just as jaded as you. By going for someone five or more years your junior, they’ll likely be much more optimistic — and that will likely rejig your own attitude towards dating.

That’s not to say that you should throw all of your dealbreakers to the wind and go for someone with whom you truly have nothing in common. However, it does perhaps mean flipping your usual script and picking a date who’s completely outside of your comfort zone and someone you probably wouldn’t have ever considered before. You never know, it could just change everything.

How can this benefit your dating life?

  1. You get to have new experiences. Dating someone younger can expose you to new experiences and perspectives that you may not have encountered before. They may have different interests, hobbies, and ways of looking at the world, which is really refreshing and a lot of fun. They’ll probably suggest date ideas that your peers wouldn’t even think of. Given how boring the ol’ dinner and a movie thing can be, this is a very welcome change.
  2. You’ll have more energy and vitality. Generally speaking, younger people tend to have more energy than us old fogies. I’m not saying you’re dating some old pepaw or memaw who wants to sit knitting or building birdhouses all day. However, by the time you hit your late 20s and 30s, a lot of people are way less adventurous than they used to be. Thankfully, 180-dating can change all of that.
  3. Your confidence will skyrocket. Dating someone younger can also boost your confidence, as not only do they tend to be more vocal but you’ll also feel like a total f**king snack because you can still bag someone younger than you. Obviously, your self-worth isn’t based on someone wanting to have sex with you, but it is a nice little confidence boost.
  4. It can rekindle your passion. Because younger people haven’t been in the dating world for quite as long as you have, they’re likely to be a lot more passionate about it (and you!). Seeing how carefree and intense their emotions are and how open-minded they are in their approach to dating can give a bit of that back to you as well.
  5. You can enjoy more spontaneity. Sometimes dating can become very routine and boring, which is why 180-dating is so great. Younger people often fly by the seat of their pants when it comes to what they do and when. Obviously, that’s not an excuse for someone keeping you on the back burner and only texting “u up?” at 2 a.m. However, a little bit of spontaneity can be a whole lot of fun.
  6. You get to feel young again. Like I said, it’s so easy to become jaded by dating the longer you’re in the scene. Remember when you first started dating and you were full of hope? You loved going out and meeting new people even if it didn’t lead to anything. Well, 180-dating is here to give that back to you.
  7. You might widen your social circle. Even if you don’t end up being in a long-term relationship with the younger person you’re dating, you still might make some good friends. And given how hard it is to make friends as an adult, this is always welcome.
  8. You can learn new things. You might think you know everything there is to know about dating and relationships because you’ve been around the block that many things. However, younger people have plenty of things to teach you — as long as you’re willing to listen.
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill