20 Crazy Thoughts You Have During a Pregnancy Scare

Sometimes, no matter how careful you’re being, accidents happen. Maybe the condom breaks and your guy doesn’t pull out, or it’s a drunken Saturday night and you’re not too worried about using one in the first place… Whatever the case, many of us have probably gone through a pregnancy scare once or twice in our lives, and the roller coaster of emotions that takes place between your missed period and finding out that – whew! – you’re not expecting after all can be… more than a little crazy.

  1. “…Uh-oh.” This is not happening.
  2. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.” It’s never happened before, after all.
  3. “Am I late?” I’ve been a day or so late, nothing to worry about.
  4. “…I am so late.” Okay, but this long? It’s been a few days…
  5. “Am I pregnant?” “…oh GOD I’M PREGNANT!”
  6. “This cannot be happening.” I’m too young! I still have my whole life ahead of me!
  7. “I wonder how much an abortion would cost?” Would my insurance even cover it? Is it even legal in my state??
  8. “Is that a bulge??” That’s totally a bulge.
  9. “I’m not ready to be a mother!” I don’t have any training!
  10. “…I could totally be a mom right now.” Well, if I had to… I’m sure I’d be pretty great at it.
  11. “Maybe I’ll give it up for adoption.” It should at least go to a good home, with a financially stable family who can take good care of it.
  12. “I CANNOT give this baby up for adoption.” It’s my flesh and blood! My child!
  13. “…But how will I afford it??” I can barely take care of myself! There’s no way I can handle another mouth to feed.
  14. “Maybe the father will support me?” He said he’d stick with me through anything…
  15. “How am I going to tell him?” He is NOT going to like this.
  16. “Does this mean we have to get married now?!” Wasn’t planning on furthering the child-out-of-wedlock trend, but…
  17. Alternately: “WHO EVEN IS THE FATHER?!” Oh God, I don’t remember his NAME or what he even LOOKED LIKE! WHY did I do this?!
  18. “Should I be drinking this wine right now?” Probably not… but then again…
  19. “Wait a second… is that my period?!” SWEET JESUS YES IT IS. It’s about damn time.
  20. “Well, guess I’m not pregnant after all.” Whew.