40 Things Every Woman Should Understand About Love

1. When it comes to men, act like the buyer, not the seller.

2. Men are not women. They don’t want to watch The Fault In Our Stars with you.

3. The hottest guy in the room is usually a loser.

4. Hold on to your girlfriends. They will fulfill you in ways a man can’t.

5. Bitching and nagging don’t work. The only thing that really gets a man’s attention:  leaving.

6. In a negotiation, you’ll probably end up with the least you’re willing to take. This is true when it comes to men also. So: have high standards and stick to them.

7. A man in love will do anything for you… until he realizes he has you. So when you give yourself to him, try to hold a little back to keep him on his toes.

8. Settling rarely works. It’s like buying something on credit — you’ll eventually have to pay. Be picky.

9. You don’t need to know how to cook but most men will appreciate it if you do.

10. There are some fantastic men out there but whether one of them becomes your boyfriend or husband depends a lot on how much you respect yourself.

11. Men want to be successful, at work and in their relationships. If you want to make him happy, show him that he’s succeeded in making you happy. (Conversely, complain all the time and he’ll associate you with failure.)

12. Don’t get caught up in how good a guy looks “on paper.” His resume might make him seem like a catch but he might just be a douchebag walking around in a catch’s clothing.

13. Men will aways look at attractive women, even when they’re in love. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. The good ones do it in a way that isn’t obvious.

14. If a guy isn’t into you, don’t doubt yourself — doubt him.

15. Your physical appearance isn’t the most attractive part of you. Looks fade; charm is forever.

16. Sex — and life, in fact — are most fun when you’re comfortable with yourself. If you’re not comfortable with yourself, you should make that a priority.

17. Don’t play hard to get. Be hard to get.

18. If you’re spending hours on the phone with your girlfriends analyzing a guy’s behavior, he’s not the one.

19. Don’t be an overpleaser when it comes to men. A woman who’s too nice is a turnoff.

20. If he’s not chasing you in the beginning, he’ll disappoint you in the end.

21. It’s better to be alone than in a bad relationship. Know when to walk away and don’t look back.

22. Romantic comedies are for women what watching sex online is for men: fantasy. Men in real life don’t behave like characters Ryan Gosling plays on screen.

23. Toss your checklist. Love is an adventure — it’s best experienced without a map.

24. Sex gets better with every passing year. So do we, in all the ways that really matter.

25. You will get over your ex. That moment of total recovery — when you can’t believe wtf you were doing with him in the first place— is liberating. Don’t stand in the way of it by texting him, seeing him, or sleeping with him.

26. Don’t ever compete with another woman for a man. It’s beneath you.

27. Texting can get you into trouble. Don’t be rash. Think before you send.

28. Never revolve your life around a man. No matter how much he wants you around, maintain some independence. Your relationship will be better off for it and last longer.

29. It’s not for you to prove yourself to a man. He should be trying to prove himself to you.

30. You’re not a bomb. Stop worrying about the ticking of your clock.

31. Today is the youngest you’ll ever be. Live it up.

32. When a woman flirts, it should be unmistakable but understated.

33. A man needs to hunt you and win you in order to value you. Don’t ruin it by giving it up too easily. In fact, make it the hunt of his life and he might just become the love of your life.

34. It doesn’t matter that you don’t look like a model. But it matters if you’re preoccupied with that. There’s nothing sexier than a confident, secure woman.

35. If you feel like you need to check his phone, it’s already over.

36. Nice guys will look better and better as you get older.

37. If you’ve never had an orgasm, you haven’t lived. Work on that.

38. Don’t ever curse your intelligence, even if it feels like it complicates your love life. Being smart is invaluable and will ultimately serve you well in both life and love.

39. A man who wants you will make it known.

40. Who he is at the beginning is probably the best he’ll ever be. If he’s not bringing his best when he’s first getting to know you, run.

Halle Kaye is the author of the insightful, inspirational and hilarious dating guide for women, "Maybe He's Just an Asshole: Ditch Denial, Embrace Your Worth, and Find True Love!"