Although stereotypes suck, they usually exist for a reason. Case in point: New Yorkers are brash, rude, and say “f*ck” every chance they get. Yes, it’s a stereotype, but I’ve yet to meet a New Yorker who doesn’t fulfill the stereotype, myself included. The same goes for stereotypes about men; these generalities weren’t just made up on the spot, but were rather plucked from real life examples that were repeated over and over again. It doesn’t mean they’re awful human beings for living up to their stereotypes; it’s just that it makes them sort of predictable.
Here are seven guy stereotypes that you can’t really argue.
- They think with their penises. For as long as I can remember, my mom has been telling me that men think with that other head. Contrary to the fact that guys have actual brains in the head on their shoulders, they just seem to think with their penises more than anything else. They’re constantly thinking about what will be best for their penis, and nine times out of 10, that involves sex.
- They have a hard time expressing their emotions. Have you ever met a straight man who could actually tell you what he’s feeling without the influence of alcohol? Or sat through a sad movie with a guy who actually cried his eyes out? Probably not. Simply, men suck at revealing their sensitive sides; this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but rather a different thing from the way women are wired. I’m sure there’s an evolutionary reason for it, like they have to be all tough to fight off dinosaurs. (Yes, I know that dinosaurs and human beings didn’t share the planet! Obviously!)
- They’re not really interested in the whole commitment thing. Speaking of evolutionary stuff, men are programmed to drop their seed and move on. While our society has taught us that love and relationships are the key to happiness, from a biological standpoint, men want to have sex to get as many babies made as possible, and not really stick around for the long-term or the child-rearing ― probably because they fear being eaten by dinosaurs before they’re 30.
- They have a penchant for being losers. While I’m not suggesting that if you look up the word loser you’ll find a stock photo of guy, what I am suggesting is that men can be total losers. Sure, women can be losers, too, but right now we’re talking about guys and a lot of them are complete losers, thanks to their lack of feelings and fear of their emotions.
- They’re slobs. True story: Women have this uncanny ability to sniff out things better than men. So while a woman knows that it’s time to do laundry, throw out the old pizza boxes, or clean the bathroom, guys just don’t get the memo ― or rather, their noses don’t get the memo.
- They rarely notice things. Unless he’s a writer or an artist of some sort, where honing in on the details are pertinent, most men just miss things altogether. I once dated a guy who, only after a two-hour-long drunk brunch, realized that I had gone from brunette to platinum. That’s not exactly a subtle change.
- They can’t multitask for crap. Ever try to talk to a guy while he’s watching TV – or, God forbid, a sports game? It’s like there’s a cement wall built up around their entire heads so nothing is getting in there at all. It can seem cute at first, like, “Oh, how cute that he’s fulfilling a stereotype.” But when it comes down to serious business like how he forgot to replace the toilet paper or ate the last cookie and he can’t seem to focus on what you’re saying and whatever else he’s doing, it’s a damn nightmare.