It’s no surprise that dating in the 21st century isn’t at all what it used to be. Online dating, divorce statistics and the way in which society is overexposed through social media has played a game-changing role in the land of dating. Actual commitment is few and far between, expectations are higher than ever, and chivalry has been completely redefined. I’ve been fighting these facts for so long, but I realized I needed to alter the way I viewed this modern culture in order to not care about the meetings and relationships that didn’t progress into something meaningful. I think it’s time we all hop on board with these harsh dating truths that we’ll undoubtedly encounter on our search for love if we want to be successful at it.
- You might need to go online. Waiting for that chance meeting with the person you hope to pick bed linens with someday might never happen. You can wait all you want, but the reality is a lot of us are on our phones these days. Even when you’re hoping that cute guy in the checkout line will stop to check you out, chances are he’s looking down at his phone and possibly into his Tinder app or texting with a girl he met online. In order to get into his sight, and the sight of many singles, you might need to join the modern dating platform.
- You might get creepy messages/penis pics. Ugh. Yes, this is so annoying, but it is a reality. Don’t get too caught up in it. Delete the idiot and move on – unless you’re into that sort of thing. I won’t judge.
- You might go Dutch. The fact is that with online dating these days, more men are going on more dates, and so the pressure to be chivalrous and courting is a lot more expensive. Yes, it sucks when a guy is dating multiple people at the same time, but it’s another reality. Online dating gives everyone more options, including you. You can quite easily line up multiple dates in just one week. Imagine if you were a guy and expected to pay each time? The bill quickly adds up. Yes, a guy who pays stands out as a well-mannered man, but there are logical reasons why a guy may ask you to split the check.
- You might get ghosted. You might go on a really amazing date and you think you’ve totally hit it off, only to never hear from the guy again. This totally sucks – I’ve been there – but believe me when I say that you should just move on. Seriously, just keep moving forward. Ghosting is a very real thing – a douchebag thing, yes – but a thing nonetheless. There’s no point sweating it.
- You might date a lot of people. The days of going on one or two dates a year are gone. Unless you’ve found the elusive committed relationship, be prepared to date… a lot.
- You might not get married. Okay, this one isn’t meant to be a downer point, it’s just a reality. This doesn’t mean you’re going to end up alone, but more and more, people are unwilling to get married and you may come across a perfect match for you who doesn’t believe in marriage. There’s a ton of modern reasoning behind this, but the lead factor is divorce. You might meet divorcees, or people who come from broken homes that grew up never wanting marriage. Commonlaw relationships and ten year engagement-free relationships are a completely normal thing now. Don’t be shocked when you come across it.
- You might need breaks. Because modern dating is so fast-paced now and you’re dealing with so many varied approaches to it, you might need to take a breather from time to time. Unless you’re one of the lucky ones, you’re likely going to cycle though a few disasters before you finally meet the person you can foresee spending your future with. So if you’re feeling deflated, take a load off and go offline for a bit, kick your feet up and chill for a few days, weeks or months of date free downtime. And then try again with this list of things in mind. If you can get on board, learn not to sweat them, and move to your next attempt when something doesn’t work out, you might start having fun.
