7 Phases Every Woman Goes Through During PMS

There are fewer things that a woman dreads more than getting her period, and the worst part is dealing with the annoyances of PMS before it even gets here. When we’re going through PMS, we become completely different human beings. Aside from the fact that we have to carry the gigantic burden child-bearing, PMS is next on the list of miserable things to experience as a woman. In reality, women only get one good week of the month where we are completely level-headed. Here are the phases that every woman goes through during PMS:

  1. The food craving phase. The day we start PMS is the day we’re immediately getting those untameable food cravings for chicken nuggets, rocky road ice cream, cool ranch Doritos, or a jar of peanut butter. Whatever it may be, once we start craving those particular snacks, be prepared for obnoxious late night runs to the supermarket or the nearest fast food joint.
  2. The binge-eating phase. Even those of us who are on strict diets still find it incredibly difficult to withhold from giving into those unhealthy food temptations. Once we get our hands on those snacks, all hell breaks loose and the binge-eating fest begins.
  3. The “I can’t fit into any of my clothes” phase. Once our food cravings have subsided and the bloating has taken full effect, we reach that point of not being able to properly fit in our clothes. It’s time to pull out the leggings and loose fitting shirts, because those jeans that we just wore three days ago are now tight around the waist and we can’t seem to fully zip up that dress we were planning on wearing this weekend.
  4. The “too lazy to do anything” phase. Let’s be honest, we don’t feel the most attractive when we’re bloated, have uncontrollable gas, and are about to start bleeding from our vaginas. This is our free pass to have a legitimate excuse for staying in this weekend where we can watch a series of rom-coms and wear the same sweat pants three days in a row.
  5. The mood swing phase. Hormones suck. As much as we try to keep our sanity at a reasonably decent level, sometimes our emotions just get the best of us. At a certain point during PMS, we arrive at the phase of not being able to control our wildly, unpredictable mood swings. One small comment or act can send us over the edge at any given time and we all of a sudden go from normal to nuts in the blink of an eye.
  6. The depressed phase. For some reason, all of the suppressed sadness that we’ve been trying to avoid catches up with us. We have that one day where it’s a full on crying fest out that happens out of the blue and we can’t quite stop the tears from falling. Once this happens, you better grab your box of tissues and start picking out your favorite chocolate candies.
  7. The irrationally horny phase. For some reason, there comes that time during PMS when we become irrationally horny and are dying to have sex. If you’re in a relationship, you can’t wait for your boyfriend to come over so you can jump his bones and if you’re single, you want to pounce on the next hot guy that crosses your path.
Lindsey is a Digital Advertising Professional and Freelance Writer based in New York City. In her spare time, she enjoys running, traveling, and drinking ridiculous amounts of coffee. Follow her on Twitter @lindseyruns