7 Reasons You Could End Up With Someone You Never Expected

You meet a great guy who’s smart, kind, respectful and seems like an amazing catch. The only problem? He’s not at all what you envisioned when you thought about your dream guy — but that shouldn’t keep you from giving him a chance. You might think you know what you want, but maybe you won’t actually know until you find it. Here’s why:

  1. Sometimes love comes as a surprise. It doesn’t tap you on the shoulder and let you in on what’s coming your way. Sometimes it just hits you out of nowhere and it’s a total shock. This guy might not be exactly what you expected, but somehow he’s everything you ever wanted and everything you never knew you needed. It’s the world’s greatest gift and you’ll be one lucky girl.
  2. You shouldn’t have a “type.” If you only date one type of guy, you’ll never know what you might be missing out on with the others. You’ve made these rules for yourself but if you’re still single, what have they really done for you? Maybe it’s time to change your game up. Maybe you should try giving the guys you’ve filtered out another chance — one of them could just be the right guy for you.
  3. Every guy deserves a chance. He’d better use it wisely, though. You can’t just turn down guys left and right before you really give them a shot with you. If you don’t feel a spark then let him down gently, but you can’t feel something if you weeded him out before he said a single word. You need to at least give him a big enough chance to see if you have a connection. You can try picturing your Prince Charming, but you can’t predict “The One.”
  4. Love isn’t a choice. It’s inevitable or it’s non-existent. There’s no in-between. That’s the magic of love — you don’t really have a say in the matter. Your heart wants what it wants and your head can try to get in the way, but it’s never really going to change how you feel. He might not be what you expected, but that won’t change the fact that you fell for him. You can try to stop love but you’ll never succeed. You love who you love and it’s not up to you. That’s why it’s called fate.
  5. You don’t always get what you want… But that can be a good thing because instead of life handing you everything you ask for, it gives you what you need instead. Maybe you didn’t get exactly what you wanted because you didn’t really know what that was. You have to accept the fact that you don’t always know what’s best. Sometimes you just have to let life take the reigns, and letting go of that control might be the thing that helps you finally find love.
  6. You can’t want something if you don’t know exists. Basically, you can’t possibly know to want something you’ve never experienced and maybe don’t even know exists. Sure, you have a general idea of wanting a guy who’s smart, funny, respectful, etc. But you can’t know the specifics of your perfect guy because you haven’t met him yet. When you do, you’ll probably realize he was what you wanted all along.
  7. When you find “The One,” you just know it. A guy might sound perfect on paper, but you can’t force yourself into loving someone just because they sound good. You shouldn’t have to question whether or not you really love him or if he’s the right person for you. You need to be confident in your love. You might be surprised by who you end up loving, but that’s not the same as wondering if your love is real. When your love is pure, there is no question. You just know.
  8. Reality will exceed your expectations. You’ve dreamed about finding love your whole life, but no matter how hard you try to imagine it, your daydreams will never compare to the real thing. He may not be what you expected, but at the end of the day, you’d never trade your fairytale for anyone else’s. You can try to dream up your perfect relationship, but the imagination can only go so far. When you find true love, it’ll be nothing like you expected because it will be so much better than you could have ever imagined.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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