Of all the betrayals that are possible in a relationship, cheating is arguably the most terrible and the hardest one to come back from. It also says a lot about the person who’s unfaithful and what they’re like as a human being. If you’ve ever wondered what infidelity means about the cheater’s life as a whole, read on.
- Cheaters have a hard time making decisions. Although this is certainly true of their relationships, if you look closely, you’ll see that it is likely true in other parts of their lives too. They may move from job to job. Sometimes they change living situations a lot. They may not even be able to maintain long-term friendships. If someone is a cheater and they want to stop, they might want to start by addressing why they have such a hard time making decisions and sticking with them.
- Cheaters are impulsive. People who cheat often have a hard time regulating their emotions. They do things based on what will feel good in the moment or what will bring them a burst of happiness. People cheat in their relationships because they can’t control their impulses, but you’ll see other areas of their lives affected as well. They might buy expensive things they know they can’t afford or they eat out a lot or they pick up and drop habits before they can even really learn to enjoy them.
- Cheaters are insecure. They need constant validation of a partner’s love and affection. Not everyone is able to keep up to that, so when their partners get busy with life, their own problems, or anything else and can’t give them the 100% fully focused love and adoration that they crave, they become insecure and look for someone who can. At least for the time being. Cheaters might also think that breaking up with their partner is bound to happen at some point, so they start looking for a replacement long before there are even any indications that their partner might dump them.
- Cheaters are thrill-seekers. For some cheaters, it’s not about love or affection. It’s totally about the thrill of the chase. They are trying to do something they aren’t supposed to do just to see if they can get away with it. The more they get away with it, the more they do it. They are after the thrill they get when they manage to do something they shouldn’t, like cheating. This is a big red flag because if they are cheating for the thrill of not getting caught, they might try doing other things that are not acceptable like drugs or driving drunk.
- Cheaters like to keep their secrets. If you’ve noticed that your partner is hiding things from you, like where they are or who they are with, even when there’s no real reason to hide that information, they could be a prime candidate for cheating. They become very defensive when they are asked questions. A main reason why they hide information is that they don’t want to leave a trail that can follow them back to their activities. They may not lie but if they just keep information secret they don’t have to keep track of the lies. Cheaters might even be so serious about keeping their info under lock and key that they don’t use social media. They might not even have social media accounts.
- Cheaters are self-absorbed. Nothing matters except them and their feelings and activities. They cheat because they don’t care. They are only looking out for their own pleasure. The thought of hurting someone doesn’t even cross their mind until it is too late. It might not even bother them if someone gets hurt. “I’m just me” and “I mind my own business” are common phrases they say as an excuse for what they do.
- Cheaters will cheat again. Most cheaters will not stop. The feeling of cheating can be addicting. If they get away with it once, they will do it again. Even if they get caught, they will learn from the first experience and try not to make the same mistakes again. Cheaters also cheat multiple times because of all the traits mentioned above. It takes a lot of self-reflection to acknowledge that you might need to fix yourself.
Cheating hurts everyone. Cheaters might hurt themselves the most by refusing to deal with their problems and turning to cheating to find answers instead. The best you can do as an individual to avoid being cheated on is look for traits like being self-absorbed, impulsive, insecure, and a thrill-seeker. Avoid getting involved with people like that. Don’t rush into relationships before you know if the other person has these qualities.