Someone asked me last week why I always say “I could be wrong” before giving my opinion.
“You do it constantly,” they said. “It makes you sound unsure of yourself.”
But I’m not unsure. I’m just aware that I might be missing information. That my perspective isn’t the only valid one. That being certain about everything is usually a sign you’re not thinking hard enough.
I picked up that phrase from my boss years ago. She’d say it before making decisions, before giving feedback, before disagreeing with people. And at first, I thought it was a bad thing, and she didn’t trust herself.
But the weird thing was, she was almost always right. Because she left room to be corrected. She invited people to challenge her thinking. And when they did, she adjusted. She wasn’t protecting her ego—she was protecting the quality of her decisions.
That’s when I started paying attention to how the smartest people I know actually talk. The words they use. The questions they ask. The phrases that show up over and over.
Here are the phrases that separate high-level thinkers from everyone else.
1. “I Could Be Wrong About This.”
You know the person who states every opinion like it’s a settled fact? Who speaks with absolute certainty about things they learned five minutes ago?
That’s not what high-level thinkers do.
They preface their statements with doubt. “I could be wrong, but…” “I might be missing something, but…”
It’s called intellectual humility.
Research on decision-making found that people who regularly acknowledge uncertainty make better predictions and adjust faster when new information shows up. They’re not attached to being right—they just want to know the truth.
This phrase creates space for correction. It signals openness to being wrong. And ironically, being willing to be wrong makes you right more often.
2. “What Am I Missing?”
Someone disagrees with you. Your first thought is probably: they don’t understand. If they understood what I understand, they’d agree with me.
But people who think at a higher level flip that assumption.
They ask themselves: “What am I not seeing?” “What information do I not have?” “What perspective am I missing?”
Studies on collaborative problem-solving show that assuming gaps in your own knowledge leads to better solutions than assuming gaps in others’ understanding.
I catch myself doing this now when I’m certain I’m right and someone’s pushing back. Instead of getting frustrated, I ask what I’m missing. Half the time, turns out I was missing something big.
3. “Tell Me More About That.”
Someone says something that sounds ridiculous to you. Dead wrong. Completely off base.
And instead of correcting them, you ask them to keep talking.
According to research on productive dialogue, people who delay their reactions and invite elaboration reach mutual understanding significantly faster than those who immediately counter-argue.
Sometimes they explain, and you realize they’re right.
Sometimes you both discover the issue is more complex than either of you thought.
Sometimes you still disagree, but at least you understand why.
The smartest people I know use this phrase constantly, because they genuinely want to understand before they respond.
4. “I Changed My Mind.”
Changing your mind feels embarrassing.
So most people stick with positions they no longer believe. They defend ideas they’ve privately abandoned. They’d rather be consistently wrong than inconsistently right.
High-level thinkers announce it.
“I used to think X, but now I think Y.”
“I was wrong about that.”
“This new information shifted my perspective.”
Research tracking intellectual flexibility found something surprising: people who openly acknowledge changing their minds are seen as more credible, not less. The willingness to update your views signals you’re learning.
Besides, sticking with a belief after evidence contradicts it is just stubbornness.
5. “That’s Not My Area Of Expertise.”
A lot of people feel compelled to have opinions on everything.
Politics, economics, science, medicine, education—it doesn’t matter if they’ve never studied it. They’ll weigh in with confidence anyway.
The sharpest thinkers do the opposite. They say they don’t know enough to have an informed opinion, that the topic is outside their area, that they haven’t studied it enough to comment.”
Studies on actual expertise show a pattern: real experts readily admit the boundaries of their knowledge. The more someone knows, the more they recognize how much they don’t know.
When someone easily says “I don’t know,” it’s often a sign they know a lot. They just understand where their knowledge ends.
6. “Help Me Understand Your Perspective.”
It’s very hard not to have a physical reaction to someone saying something you disagree with. The tempting move is to explain why they’re wrong.
People who think more deeply take a different approach.
“Help me understand how you’re looking at this.” “Walk me through your reasoning.” “What led you there?”
Research on persuasion found that people who approach disagreements with genuine curiosity change more minds than people who approach with correction. Understanding doesn’t mean agreeing—it just means you grasp their position well enough to engage honestly.
This shifts the energy. It turns a debate into a dialogue. And in dialogue, people actually think instead of just defending.
7. “I Don’t Know.”
Three words. The hardest phrase to say.
Someone asks you something, and you don’t know the answer. Instead of guessing or deflecting or making something up, you just say it: “I don’t know.”
It feels vulnerable. Like you should know. Like not knowing makes you look stupid.
But high-level thinkers just admit it. And then, if it matters, they find out.
I’ve started doing this at work. Someone asks me something I’m unsure about, and instead of faking confidence, I say: “I don’t know. Let me check and get back to you.” It’s never hurt me. Usually it helps. Because I’m not giving people wrong information.
8. “What Would Change Your Mind About This?”
This question separates thinking from identity.
If someone can tell you what evidence would change their mind, they’re thinking. Their position is based on reasoning. They’re open to persuasion if the right information shows up.
If they can’t answer—if nothing would change their mind—then their belief isn’t based on evidence. It’s part of who they are.
Studies on belief formation found that just asking people to consider what would change their minds increases intellectual humility and reduces polarization. The act of considering the question makes people more flexible.
People who think at the highest level ask this of themselves and others. Not to trap anyone. But to figure out if the conversation is worth having. If both people are genuinely thinking, a productive conversation is possible.
These phrases don’t make you smarter by themselves. But they signal something crucial about high-level thinkers: they’re more interested in truth than being right. They’re open to learning instead of just defending. They see conversations as chances to think better, not battles to win. And that shift is what actually separates the people who think at a high level from people who just think they do.
