8 Reasons Why Amazing Women Take So Much Longer To Find Love

They say men get more mature, successful, and better looking with age. Sadly, society seems to believe the opposite about women. A single woman in her thirties? She must be crazy. I bet she has loads of baggage. She’s definitely bitter and unlovable. If no one else has snapped her up, why would I? That’s BS—here’s the real truth.

  1. She doesn’t adhere to society’s preconceived timeline. Women are well aware of the looming milestones we’re supposed to hit by certain ages in our lives. The pestering questions start at about 26 and just get more intense from there. Are you dating anyone? Married? Why aren’t you pregnant? Better hurry, your body is about to wither and die and you won’t be able to do the only thing you’re put here to do—pop out a baby! I think you get the picture. Pressure and aging be damned—this woman respectfully says screw that and simply lives her life. She’s not against the traditional life course. In fact, she’s cheered on and supported her friends who’ve chosen that route—marriage, a house, kids—but it’s not necessarily for her and she’s OK with that.
  2. She doesn’t want kids. She doesn’t have a biological clock ticking away, telling her to find a guy to father her child by a certain age. Let’s be real—this is why a lot of people end up settling in their twenties. This reason also cuts down her dating pool quite a bit, but the right person will also be happy with a child-free life. It might be controversial but really, what critically thinking person wants to bring a child into this current world anyway?
  3. She knows what she wants and she won’t settle for less. She knows her worth and is picky as hell and unapologetic about it. Through experience and self-awareness, she knows what she has to offer and what she wants in return—and she knows settling for any less than that will only lead to unhappiness and resentment. This greatly whittles down the men who are worthy of her time and energy. One of the best things about dating this woman? She doesn’t need constant validation since her self-worth and happiness don’t rely on approval from others, not even her dude.
  4. She doesn’t need a manIt’s safe to assume that a single woman in her thirties has a great career and life of her own and can support herself. She’s independent and she doesn’t need financial, emotional, or penis support to fulfill her. This is not to say she doesn’t WANT a man, she has deep and meaningful relationships, interests, and passions outside of dating. She’ll still have these things even if she does bag a dude and she wants him to have a life outside of her as well.
  5. She’s rebellious at heart. A woman who’s still single in her thirties is without a doubt a bit of a rebel. She’s avoided society’s pressures and come out the other side. She’s a badass lady who seeks the same—a badass man (not a bad boy—big difference). The best part about dating this kind of woman is that there’s no conventional expectation of what a man should be. She’s shed her own status quo role, so why would she expect her guy to keep his?
  6. She hasn’t met her equal. She’s a whole person who’s done the work to find herself and remain self-aware. She’s sought to understand herself and why she is the way she is whether via therapy, self-help books, or internet research and she’s faced up to some hard truths. She wants a man who’s been there and done the same. It’s rare to find this in men because of their own BS societal pressures, but she’ll hold out for the man who said screw it and discovered himself anyway.
  7. She’s mastered the subtle art of not giving a damn. She understands it takes a great deal of time and energy to give a damn about things. Therefore, she’s carefully honed the number she gives and they are very few. This means she doesn’t put up with or care about what other people think of her, dating drama, or men’s egos. This woman is confident as hell, which is a rare trait of younger women (or anyone in their twenties) and a holy grail quality to be treasured.
  8. She intimidates men. No, she’s not intimidating, men are intimidated by her. Yes, there’s a difference. Only an insecure man is intimidated by a badass woman who has her act together. If a dude is secure in who he is and knows what he has to offer, nothing intimidates him. This woman certainly isn’t “easy,” but who wants easy? She’s worth the effort and once you get her, you’ll never want to let this force-of-nature go.
Michelle is a very old millennial who's been dating for far too long. She is a writer, video producer, and dog mom who is just trying to survive in the tech bro metropolis of Seattle. To read more of her dating stories aka rants, go here: https://thetinderspinster.tumblr.com/