We’ve all heard the accusations: romance is dead, and so is chivalry. But are they really? Maybe guys aren’t laying down their jackets for us to walk over puddles, but that doesn’t mean that all hope is lost for those of us who call ourselves romantics. Even laid back women still want romance, and that’s nothing to feel guilty about. Luckily, romance isn’t dead. Here are some of the reasons that we’re still holding out hope:
- Ever since the 1990s, divorce rates are actually going down. Although pop culture has somehow internalized the statistic that half of marriages end up in divorce, a New York Times study shows that recent marriages have actually fared much better. According to the study, the divorce rate peaked in the 1970s and has been declining ever since. Social scientists now think that almost 70% of marriages will make it until death.
- Valentine’s Day spending continues to rise. Who says that chivalry doesn’t exist? Certainly not florists and chocolatiers. According to a study by the National Retail Federation, Americans spent $23.9 billion on Valentine’s Day in 2022. That was a $2.1 billion increase from 2021, and also the second highest year on record. See? Romance isn’t dead.
- We’re dating whoever we want to. We’re not tied down by stereotypes about who we should love. The Pew Research Center reports that millennials are supportive of interracial relationships across the board. Nine out of 10 respondents said they’d be happy to date or have a family member or friend date someone from a different ethnic background. In a separate study, the Pew Research Center found that every generation is more accepting of same-sex relationships than the one that came before. We’re not being limited by old stereotypes, and that’s a good thing.
- Long-distance relationships are on the rise. In a way, there’s no relationship more innocent than a long distance relationship. The require commitment, self-control, self-sacrifice, and a great deal of patience. The fact that so many people are willing to stick with their long-distance lovers is a clear declaration that when we find love, we want to hold on to it and make it work at all costs. The 2017 US census found that since the turn of the 21st century, there’s been a 44% increase in married couples living apart. The total was thought to be around four million people at that point, and that number is only increasing with time.
- Guys all over the world are continuously wowing us with awesome, creative proposals. So many guys are stepping up their game and taking proposals to a whole new level. These guys are basically the poster boys for romance. If you’re someone who’s always dreamed of the day your significant other pops the question, this should give you hope.
- Even high schoolers are getting onto the romance train with “promposals.” When we were teenagers in the 2000s, getting a date to the prom was as simple as writing a note to your crush with a “Circle One: Yes, No” scribbled on the bottom. The “romantics” were the ones who would simply ask you themselves (but not before getting confirmation of your impending approval through friends, of course). These days, wannabe prom dates are expect jump through the elaborate hoops of creative “promposals” asking girls to be their dates.
- Cuddling has been scientifically proven to help cure headaches and migraines. It’s true. When you cuddle with your loved one, your brain releases oxytocin, which helps surprises pain, especially in the cases of headaches and migraines. Forget the pills. Bring on the cuddles.
- Men are doing more housework. Statistically, men are spending more time on housework than they did in previous generations. What’s more romantic than your sweetie folding the laundry? Seriously, though. Women really do find guys helping out around the housework hot. Research published by the Council On Contemporary Families shows that couples who share chores equally have more and better sex. Now that’s romantic.
Things good guys do to prove romance isn’t dead
If the above statistics aren’t enough to convince you that romance is alive and well, that’s fine. Just look for guys who do the following things. They’ll resore your faith in love in no time.
- They make you feel beautiful. When you get home from the gym with sweat covering every inch of your skin, they still plant kisses on you. They make you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world, even when you know you look like a total train wreck.
- They make an effort with their appearance. Even if they hate wearing preppy, button-down shirts, they do it for you. After all, they know how much effort you put into your appearance. It’s really the least he can do. You don’t want him to change who he is, you just want him to make an effort to tidy himself up sometimes.
- They stand up for you. It doesn’t matter if a stranger or their own mother makes a rude comment about you. If something nasty comes out of someone’s mouth about you, chivalrous guys won’t hesitate to defend your honor.
- They do chores without being asked. Whenever they visit your house, they do the dishes or tidy up your living room in order to make your life easier. The craziest thing is that they don’t do it for the brownie points.
- They make sure you get home safe. When they don’t have the opportunity to drive you home, they text you to make sure you get there safe. If they don’t hear from you, they don’t get any rest because they worry about you.
- They buy gifts for your whole family. Buying a gift for you isn’t enough. They also buy holiday gifts for your parents, your siblings, and your pet rabbits.
- They keep you warm. They keep cozy blankets on his couch for you, turn up the heat in their car even when they’re sweating, and let you borrow their jacket. They value your comfort over his own sometimes. It’s really sweet.
- They go down on you. They surprise you with oral when you least expect it, and when they’re done, they won’t even want to have sex. They’re just happy that they made you happy.
- They actually tell you how they feel. Instead of letting Hallmark do the talking, they actually write out their feelings for you inside of your birthday cards. On random days, they might even send you text messages stating their undying love for you “just because.”
- They remember the little things. They don’t need to remember your least favorite flavor of Skittles, but they do. Even better, when they shares them with you, they pick out that flavor to make sure you never get a taste.