Some men get away with a lot. For some reason, we constantly make excuses for guys’ bad behavior and let them off the hook easily when in reality, they’re just being jerks and we need to start calling them out and holding them accountable.
He waited days to respond because he was “just busy.”
We all get busy sometimes, but no one is so busy that they can’t spare 30 seconds to respond to a text message for days at a time. He’s seen your message, he knows you’re waiting for a response but he just doesn’t care much — because he’s an ass who doesn’t know how lucky he is that you’ve given him any attention at all.
He’s sex-focused right away “because he’s a man.”
When a guy is pushy about sex a little too early, we shrug it off and say, “That’s just what guys are like.” That’s fine, but having a penis doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the patience to wait until you’re ready. If he can’t take no for an answer, it’s not because he’s just a guy — it’s because he only cares about himself.
He has “commitment issues.”
You’re dating a guy and you’re totally falling head over heels when he drops the bomb on you that he has problems with commitment. If you want a relationship, and he has problems with committing, then commit to walking away from him, because he’s not ready for a relationship with you.
He doesn’t mean it when he treats you like crap — “he cares about you.”
When he repeatedly mistreats you and you’re quick to point out the ways he cares about you, stop and give yourself a little shake. Would someone who cares about you call you nasty names or play mind games with you? Just because he’s done nice things for you in the past doesn’t give any guy a free pass to treat you like an emotional punching bag.
He just has “trust issues” because of his last relationship.
Having a messy relationship history is the pits — there’s no denying that. But just because someone treated him poorly before you doesn’t mean he needs to take his issues out with you. You’re the new woman in the picture who’s done him no harm and if he’s not ready to trust you, he shouldn’t be dating anyone at all.
He made a “mistake” when he cheated.
I know a lot of people argue this one, but I’m going to give it to you straight — cheating is never a mistake. He didn’t trip and fall and accidentally stick his penis into someone else. He wasn’t “too drunk” and unless there was a legitimate case of being drugged, he knew exactly what he was doing. Cheating is never a mistake — it’s only a mistake that he got caught.
You had sex with him too early on and he lost respect for you.
Ladies, we need to stop doubting and blaming ourselves when a man who gets us into bed suddenly walks right out of our lives. Furthermore, other women need to stop shaming the women who felt ready in the moment to have sex with a guy they thought cared for them. If he bails after sex with you, you should be the one who loses respect for him, because grown ass and mature men don’t hold this against you- they know they participated too.
He bought you something, therefore he’s sorry.
Sending you flowers or buying you something expensive doesn’t absolve him from whatever he did to upset you. Grown up relationships move past issues by having adult conversations about them — they don’t sugar coat them with material cover ups. You still need to talk about the problem.
“He’s just a man.”
Being a man isn’t something we should be accepting just to excuse jerk behavior. Yes, he’s a man and he may have different instincts than women, but all men still need to know and exercise the concept of respect — otherwise, he’s not a real man.
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