We’ve all been there: so totally smitten with the new guy in our lives that life is super rosy, everything is amazing and we can’t ever imagine feeling any differently. Then it happens, and we can’t figure out how we were ever interested in this person in the first place. We’re now 100 percent turned off, and can’t believe this is someone we spent hours and hours making out with. Now the thought is so gross. It’s a sad day when love and lust are suddenly gone and replaced with total revulsion, and there are a few common factors that can cause that switchover with your emotions. Here are the 10 stunts your boyfriend can pull that are major turn-offs.
- Texting a million times when you’re with your BFFs. I can’t tell you the number of time I’ve been out for some much needed drinks and gossip with a good friend and her boyfriend just won’t stop texting. He knows she’s out, so why can’t he just let her have fun? No, it’s more important for him to get pissed off that she’s not responding and then proceed to phone several times. Don’t accept this kind of controlling texting behavior from any guy. It’s so uncool.
- Bailing on your party/event/social plans. There’s nothing more humiliating than if you throw a party and your boyfriend doesn’t show up, and it’s super disrespectful, too. Your BF needs to show up to, period. If he doesn’t take this seriously, then he doesn’t take you seriously, and you need to either have a serious talk, or it’s goodbye forever.
- Being super needy and insecure. We’re all human, we all have flaws and it’s not possible to expect someone to be perfect. But when your BF shows that he’s really, really insecure about himself and your relationship, you’re going to find him much less attractive, since the one thing that turns us all on is major confidence. His insecurity is going to make him pretty clingy, and that’s going to gross you out, too.
- Not doing what he says he will. If your guy says he’ll text you later and doesn’t, or flakes on your plans, he’s trying to tell you something important, and it’s probably not that he wants to be with you forever. Guys show they want to break up in some pretty obvious ways. They’d rather just ignore you instead of tell you that it’s over. Once you figure that out, you won’t be so into him anymore, and you’ll do the smart thing and be the one to give the break-up speech.
- Suddenly freaking out about commitment. You would think that if you were with someone for five years (or even one year!) they would be okay with the idea of committing to you. But as we all know, that isn’t always the case. It’s a real turn-off when your guy refuses to talk about the future, because future plans are kind of important for a relationship. Once someone says they’re not so sure they want things to be so serious, it’s like a switch turns off and we lose all our attraction for them.
- Telling you eons after your first date that he doesn’t believe in marriage. Not everyone wants to get married. We get it. It’s all good. But it’s nice if you let someone know pretty early on, especially if they’re expecting you to put a ring on it at some point. It’s super frustrating to realize that your BF of 2 years who you thought was your One True Love actually has zero intention of ever proposing. If marriage is super important to you, you’ll wonder how you ever thought he was a good catch and will hate that you wasted so much time on someone who doesn’t think your love can go the distance.
- Bailing on your family vacation last minute. It’s a pretty big deal to invite your BF to come along with you and your fan on your annual summer trip. But suddenly you’re supposed to hit the road in an hour and you get a text saying that he can’t make it. He got baseball tickets from a friend, he’s got to work — the sky’s the limit when it comes to the potential excuses because chances are none of them are the truth.
- Claiming you’re smothering him and he needs space. Yawn. This is such a boring thing to be told. If he wants space, he can have it – so much space, in fact, that he is now super far away from you.
- Refusing to be social at parties. I’ve been to so many parties where someone’s BF literally sits in the corner and won’t talk to anyone. At all. You maybe want the person you’re in a relationship with to actually be social. Just maybe. If your boyfriend is super socially awkward, you might start thinking about him differently. After all, if you want things to go somewhere, how are you going to feel when he can’t even talk to your friends and family at your wedding?