9 Subtle Signs Your Ex Really Misses You

Breaking up is really hard to do, especially if there are still lingering feelings. Sometimes people break up based on situations out of their control rather than lack of feelings. When things like distance and life goals don’t match up, it can be a devastating break for both of you, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over for good. Sometimes exes can get back together with a changed perspective. Here are some signs that your ex still misses you and might want to reconnect someday.

  1. They like all of your Instagram posts. They don’t have to, but they do. It’s even more telling if they like them shortly after they’re posted. That’s a subtle way for their username to catch your eye and possibly make you think of them as well. Daring exes may even comment. The comment itself will probably be short, sweet, and positive. Something like “you look amazing!” is definitely a way to let you know they still have feelings for you.
  2. They text on occasion. It’s never anything major, just a “saw something today that made me think of you, how have you been?” They might as well just ask, “so, are you seeing someone?” since that’s mostly what they’re after. Yes, some exes can just become friends. But if they’re constantly keeping tabs on you, they may see your relationship restarting at some point. Remember, that’s technically how Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez reconnected.
  3. They tag you in funny memes on Facebook. It’s an innocent way to say “Hi, I’m thinking of you and think you’ll also find this funny.” It’s also a safe way to subtly connect to someone. Those tags don’t necessarily need to have a response back. You can ignore it without feeling bad, and they understand that — it’s the nature of posts like that.
  4. Some of their social media posts are a little suspicious. If your ex has been thinking about you a lot and really misses you, they might try to send some subtle vibes your way in the form of captions and pictures. Instagram is a good way to test the waters. Think about it — sometimes, your posts are really meant to be viewed by one person. If your ex tweets that they’re bored, or sends out a Facebook message saying “anyone want to do something tonight?” it could be interpreted as bait to see if you’ll view it or respond.
  5. They date someone else who kinda-sorta looks like you. Do they have a type? Probably. But, it can be a bit strange if you notice you share a lot of similarities with their ex. Think of it this way — if the relationship between the two of you ended poorly, chances are they wouldn’t necessarily rebound with your doppelganger.
  6. You catch them doing things you used to do together. Maybe you taught them how to cook breakfast, and suddenly their Instagram Stories are bursting with breakfast posts. Or, maybe you got them into a band that you’ve noticed they’ve used a lot in their stories. These can also be seen as baiting techniques to get you to respond. Or, subtle messages that they really miss having you around.
  7. Or, maybe they’re withdrawing completely. If your ex used to post on Instagram all the time and subtly stopped, they could be trying to adjust to life without you. That, or they don’t feel the need to share as much anymore. If you made their life exciting and you were the one who often suggested places to go and people to see, they may be in a rut. Sometimes, you don’t realize how much you miss someone until they’re completely out of the picture.
  8. They still keep photos of the two of you on their feed. It’s amazing how much insight people can gain by looking at social media patterns. Deleting pictures of an ex is fairly common on social media. However, some people like to leave happy moments alone. If your ex hasn’t scrubbed you from their social media, it means they still care about you as a person and they might want to hold onto the good memories a little longer.
  9. Mutual friends have suddenly made contact. The best relationships include mutual friends. While sometimes friend groups change after a split, it makes sense for the mutuals to still be in loose contact with both of you if you didn’t have a horrific breakup. Having someone from their “side” send you a message might mean that your ex has been talking about you. In fact, it may also be a sign that they’d be willing to try again with the relationship. It’s subtle, but it’s something. It could even serve as a way of telling you that they’d be fine hanging out as a full group once again.
Karen Belz is a New Jersey native who is currently living in Maryland. She has a Bachelor’s Degree in Speech Communication with a focus in Broadcasting and Print Media Studies from Millersville University of Pennsylvania. Since graduating, she has written for sites like LittleThings, HelloGiggles, and Scary Mommy and is currently an e-commerce editor at Bustle.

When she's not writing, she enjoys making her phone run out of memory after taking too many photos of her dog. You can find her on Twitter @karenebelz or on Instagram @karenbelz.