9 Ways Getting Your Heart Broken Changes You

9 Ways Getting Your Heart Broken Changes You ©iStock/max-kegfire

Losing someone you love can leave some of the deepest scars that never go away. While you’ll eventually heal and move on with your life, there’s no denying that every heartbreak changes who you are and how you see the world..

  1. It’s harder to go all-in with love. The first time you fall in love, you throw yourself right in, diving head first into your connection with your partner. You put all your eggs into one basket, but then you realize that basket has some serious holes. When it’s all over, you realize that counting solely on one person can leave you left with nothing.
  2. You realize how important your friends are. The person you put first took himself out of the equation. No matter how many bridges you burned, when your world comes crumbling down, your true friends will always be by your side. When they have your back, you’ll appreciate their loyalty like never before, and you’ll know better than to put them on the back-burner again.
  3. You learn to rely on no one but yourself. Before the breakup, you were part of a team, but then suddenly you were a solo player. When you no longer have someone to depend on, that’s when you find your true independence. You learn that in life the best person you can count on is yourself, and you never forget the strength it took to rebuild your life.
  4. You’re forced to figure out who you really are. The initial shock of a breakup can leave you questioning who you are and blaming current events on your broken personality. When you finally come to terms with the fact that there’s nothing wrong with you, only then will you discover who you really are.
  5. You start to doubt that true love actually exists. No matter what you believed before your breakup, after a blow like that, that hopeless romanticism you once had just seems stupid. If you once thought there was someone for everyone, that belief is a thing of the past, and you won’t get your faith back until the next guy to make sparks fly.
  6. You start to think you’d be better off alone. Wouldn’t it be easier to walk this life alone? Sure, it might get lonely from time to time, but you’ll always have your friends and your family. At the end of the day, you just don’t know if the heartbreak is worth it, and you won’t change your mind until love comes knocking at your door again.
  7. You decide to stop kidding yourself. When you finally see all of the holes in your relationship, that’s when you realize that you deserve better. In the relationship, you were making excuses, but now that you’re out, you can finally see how unhappy you were. Once you realize he wasn’t your Prince Charming, you’ll know you’re worth a hell of a lot more.
  8. You stop giving out trust so freely. Even if he didn’t cheat, you trusted this man to love and cherish you forever. There was no end in sight until suddenly the promise was broken. When the person you trust more than anyone else in the world lets you down, you’ll find that putting faith in anyone will be more difficult from here on out.
  9. You know you can get through anything. Because no pain could ever hurt this badly. Heartbreak may not be a physical wound, but it sure feels like one. Now that you’ve been there and done that, nothing could hit you harder, and that strength will carry you through the rest of your life.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.