I think one of the things that make relationships so complicated is that feelings can be fleeting. We all know what it’s like to be nuts about someone in the beginning, but how do you keep those feelings from fading over time? I don’t think I can offer an answer to that. However, I can help you identify when it’s happening so that you don’t get your hopes up for a guy who’s feelings for you are fading.
- He stops making plans. In fairness, this could be laziness or a sign that he doesn’t feel the need to impress you anymore. However, if planning dates or ways to spend time together has fallen on your shoulders entirely, his interest could be waning. The same is true if he only has vague ideas. If he’s interested in you, he’ll have specific ideas for places he wants to take you or things he wants to do with you. Sometimes a lack of imagination can signal a lack of interest.
- He has nothing but excuses. Of course, it’s one thing for a guy to stop trying to make plans to spend time together, but it’s another thing when he offers silly excuses for why he can’t make time for you. Let’s be clear that there is a difference between a legitimate reason and a bad excuse for why he can’t hang out. When he tries too hard to justify his terrible excuses, it’s a good indicator that he’s just not that interested in spending time with you.
- He calls you a “friend.” This could be a less-than-subtle sign that he doesn’t see you as a romantic partner, at least not anymore. Even if he didn’t do it on purpose, a Freudian slip can be quite telling as to his true feelings. Either way, he wouldn’t call you a friend if he had strong feelings and wanted things to go somewhere.
- He doesn’t worry about looking his best. Men always dress to impress whenever they’re trying to woo a woman. Only in firmly established relationships will guys let themselves go and stop caring about their appearance. If he puts forth no effort in his appearance when he knows he’s going to see you, it’s a bad sign. It could mean he’s not interested so he doesn’t care about looking his best for you.
- He lacks excitement around you. Sure, guys can lie with their words, but their eyes and the sound of their voice don’t lie. You should be able to tell when he isn’t excited to see you or talk to you. Granted, you shouldn’t overreact to an isolated incident. Sometimes people are in a bad mood and it has nothing to do with you. But if not being excited or happy to be around you becomes a regular occurrence, his interest could be fading.
- He picks stupid fights. When a guy loses interest in you, he’s no longer concerned about upsetting you. Subconsciously, he might pick fights as a way to push you away. This is also a sign that he’s more worried about getting his way because he’s no longer worried about making you happy. He wouldn’t be doing that if he was still interested in you like he was at the beginning.
- The questions stop. One of the obvious signs of being interested in someone is asking them questions. When guys are interested in you, we want to know everything about you. The questions never stop and it should be obvious that you have our attention when you speak. However, looking bored or not inquiring about things when you’re speaking is a tell-tale sign that he’s losing interest.
- There’s no affection. To be fair, you can’t judge this without some base level for how a guy shows affection. After all, a lot of guys tend to show affection in different ways. As long as there is some affection or physical contact, you’re fine. But when that starts to disappear, it’s possible his interest is disappearing as well.
- The relationship is all sex or no sex. In the end, it all comes back to sex. However, it can be tricky to gauge a guy’s interest in you based on sex alone. If he has no interest in sex, it’s possible he’s not feeling it at all. To be fair, there are many reasons why he might not be interested in sleeping with you. On the other hand, he may have lost interest in you if the relationship is nothing but having sex. He may have decided that he likes sleeping with you but nothing else. He’ll have no other feelings for you whatsoever. Of course, even if he’s not interested in you, he’ll keep sleeping with you for as long as possible until you realize that the relationship isn’t going anywhere.