As weird as it is to say, it’s hard to imagine dating without playing games. I know for a fact that women engage in a little mental trickery, but a lot of guys do this too and just as frequently. If you want to know why guys play games and what you can do about it, here are some explanations and suggestions. After all, you’re not in high school anymore, right?
- It strokes their ego. There are so many guys out there who are just driven by ego. Naturally, there are times when that ego gets out of control. In that case, playing mind games with you helps to feed his ego by giving him all of the power in the relationship. He forces you to worry about him, which will make him the center of attention, blowing up his head even more. My best advice in this situation is to not give in and encourage an egomaniac.
- They have low self-esteem. It’s funny how sometimes ego and low self-esteem are closely related, almost like two sides of the same coin. He might be playing games because he feels unworthy of you. He’s not sure if he’s good enough and he might want to bring you to his level. If you sense a guy has self-esteem issues, you might need to find ways to pump him up and assure him that you’re equals.
- They think you’re playing games. Not to sound childish, but if a guy senses you’re playing games, he might feel it makes sense to do the same. Think about what you’re doing and if you’ve been unclear with him about what you want. If he can’t figure this out, he won’t show you his cards either. Sometimes if you want the games to stop, you just have to be clear about what you want.
- They’re new at this. Some guys play games because they’re just plain immature or don’t have a lot of experience with adult relationships. They don’t know the right way to date somebody and might have picked up some bad habits from friends. If you think this might be happening, try to take charge and show him how to have a relationship without acting like a child.
- They’ve already won you over. If a guy has your attention and the chase is over, sometimes that’s the end of the fun for him. Unfortunately, some guys are all about the chase. When that’s over, they might start playing hot and cold. They’re just looking for a new way to have fun, which can also mean that they’ll probably never get serious with you.
- They only want sex. Speaking of never getting serious with you, some guys play games with you on their way to getting you in bed. If a guy’s only mission is to sleep with you, he will play whatever game he has to in order to make that happen. Technically, getting you to sleep with him is the game he’s playing. You just have to be able to spot when he only wants to sleep with you and doesn’t care about anything else.
- It’s better than opening up. At times, the stereotypes about guys not wanting to open up or be vulnerable or true. Rather than letting you know how they feel, they will just play stupid games with you. For them, this is a safe way of dating because they don’t have to worry about commitment or getting too attached. If they don’t let you know their feelings, they can avoid getting hurt. Unfortunately, this is not a great way to date from your perspective. Unless you can get him to open up, you might just have to let him loose.
- It’s all about self-defense. If a guy has been hurt in a past relationship, he might be on the defensive. It will come across as if he’s playing games, but perhaps he’s just being careful. He will play games almost like a test until he knows that he can trust you. If you like him, just be patient while trying to earn his trust. Also, don’t give him a reason to doubt you.
- It’s fun. By their very nature, games are supposed to be fun. There are guys who will play games with women just for the fun of it. There’s not always malice behind it; some guys just think that’s how relationships work and how you have fun while dating someone casually. In this situation, if you don’t like the games that a guy is playing, just break things off.
- They’re just not that into you. Sorry, but sometimes there is malice involved when guys play games. He won’t have any feelings for you but will play games just to amuse himself. If he’s not into you, he won’t give it a second thought when he acts like this. His only concern will be what he wants. Hopefully, you can recognize this quickly and break things off as soon as possible.
