I’m Always The Giver In My Relationships And I Actually Prefer It That Way

If my relationships have taught me one thing about myself, it’s that I’m always the one who loves more in them. I don’t mean to be the habitual giver when it comes to matters of the heart, but that’s what tends to happen more often than not. I need to love my partner with all of me, and if that means I’m always the one who loves more, well then so be it.

  1. I love to give and I don’t care about what I get in return. I’m a natural giver when it comes to the people I care about, and I love that about myself. Sometimes I can come up a little empty because of my need to offer up my love or assistance in any way possible, but when I’m in a relationship with someone and I’m more of a giver than they are, I never feel unfulfilled by it. As long as my partner appreciates me, I don’t see an issue with being someone who’s always on the giving side of things.
  2. I always love with everything I have. When I love someone, I do so 150 percent. I don’t skimp when it comes to my love for people if I feel they deserve it. I know that most other people aren’t like that; I’ve accepted that fact. As long as I know that they do love me, even if it’s not as much as I love them, then there’s no problem. I don’t expect a guy to be someone he’s not.
  3. I need to feel that crazy love for it to be satisfying. If I’m with someone who loves me more than I love them, there’s a decent chance that I’m not crazy about him, and that will not keep me in the relationship for very long. I need to feel like he’s all I’ve ever wanted and more for it to be something that lasts for me.
  4. I know I have the capacity to truly love another person. No matter how many bad breakups I’ve been through, I’ve never regretted loving my exes. I know without a shadow of a doubt how to love well and I won’t be sorry for that. If the person I’m with doesn’t have that same capacity, sure, I’m more likely to wind up hurt in the end, but at least I’ll have had the opportunity to truly love. That’s almost a miracle in today’s day and age.
  5. I won’t hold back for fear of scaring a guy away. I won’t hold back parts of myself or pretend to be afraid of commitment or a savage when it comes to my feelings just because that’s the way most people do things nowadays. The person I’m with is going to get all of me because that’s how a real relationship develops. Being unable to give myself to another person isn’t an option and sometimes that just means that I’ll be the one who’s more in love. So be it.
  6. I don’t want my partner to ever question how I feel about him. I’ve been in relationships where I was unsure how my partner felt about me at times because of things he did or how he acted, and I would never want the person I care about to feel that way. When I love, I do it big and I do it with purpose. I’ll love a guy more than anyone has ever loved him before because I want him to feel like he truly deserves that.
  7. I’m not afraid of commitment. Some people keep themselves an arm’s length away from their partner and with one foot out the door because of the very real fear of having their heart broken. We’ve all been there, even me, but if I let any of the jerks who broke me ruin my ability to love and commit to someone with that same devout passion, then they’ll have won. I’m better than that.
  8. I’m an eternal optimist. After everything I’ve been through when it comes to love, I still have the ability to believe that people are worth loving and that I can again find what I’ve been looking for. I’ll always be in love with love and that makes it easy for me to fall hard for someone amazing when they do come along.
  9. It actually helps my partner love me more. Even if he’s on the fence when it comes to matters of the heart, my ability to love him more than he loves me might just open up the window for him to truly let his walls down and let someone in again — that someone being me. If he can see that I love him as much as I do, I think it might just make him believe in love all over again.
  10. I love as much as I can. I do this because I want my partner to really see me — and himself, for that matter. No one will know me quite like the person I choose to fall in love with and I want that version of myself to be the best, most understanding and loving version. If I can do that for him, he’ll be able to do that for me.
Angelica Bottaro has a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Trent University and an Advanced Diploma in Journalism from Centennial College. She began her career as a freelance writer in 2014, racking up bylines in The Good Men Project, MakeWell, LymeTime, YouQueen, and more. She eventually shifted her focus and began writing about mental health, nutrition, and chronic disease for VeryWell Health.

You can follow her on Facebook or check out her website at AngelicaBottaro.ca. She also posts on Instagram @a.ct._b and Twitter @angiiebee.