“Am I A Narcissist?” 15 Signs You’re Becoming Too Self-Absorbed

“Am I A Narcissist?” 15 Signs You’re Becoming Too Self-Absorbed

Narcissism is a term that gets thrown around a lot, but what does it really mean? It’s not just about being self-confident or loving yourself; it’s a pathological level of self-absorption that can damage your relationships and hold you back in life. If you’re wondering whether you might be a narcissist, it’s time for some honest self-reflection. Here are 15 signs that you may be becoming too self-absorbed:

1. You dominate conversations.

Do you find yourself constantly steering conversations back to yourself? If you’re always the one talking and rarely listen to what other people have to say, it’s a clear sign that you’re too self-absorbed. Narcissists love to hear themselves talk and will often interrupt or talk over everyone to ensure they remain the center of attention. Learn to listen more and give other people a chance to share their thoughts and experiences.

2. You crave constant admiration and validation.

Narcissists have a deep-seated need for admiration and validation from other people. They often fish for compliments and become upset or angry when they don’t receive the praise they feel they deserve. If you find yourself constantly seeking approval and becoming irritable when you don’t get it, it’s a red flag that you may be too self-absorbed. Learn to validate yourself and find inner confidence that doesn’t rely on external praise.

3. You lack empathy.

One of the hallmarks of narcissism is a lack of empathy, Psychology Today notes. Narcissists struggle to put themselves in someone else’s shoes and often dismiss or minimize other people’s feelings. If you find it difficult to relate to people emotionally or tend to view their problems as trivial compared to your own, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Work on developing your emotional intelligence and practicing active listening.

4. You have a grandiose sense of self-importance.

Do you see yourself as superior to most people and believe that you deserve special treatment? Narcissists often have an inflated sense of their own importance and expect everyone to cater to their needs. If you find yourself frequently pulling rank or demanding preferential treatment, it’s a sign that your ego may be out of control. Practice humility and remember that everyone deserves respect, regardless of their status.

5. You exploit people for personal gain.

Narcissists often view people as objects to be used for their own benefit. They may manipulate or exploit people to get what they want, without regard for the other person’s feelings or well-being. If you find yourself frequently taking advantage of people or using them as a means to an end, it’s a clear sign that you’re too self-absorbed. Learn to value people for who they are, not just what they can do for you.

6. You have a sense of entitlement.

Do you believe that you deserve special treatment or privileges simply because of who you are? Narcissists often have a sense of entitlement and expect people to bend over backwards to accommodate their needs. If you find yourself frequently making unreasonable demands or becoming angry when you don’t get your way, it’s a sign that your sense of entitlement may be out of control. Practice gratitude and remember that the world doesn’t revolve around you.

7. You’re highly reactive to criticism.

Narcissists have a fragile sense of self-esteem and are highly sensitive to criticism or perceived slights. They often react defensively or become enraged when someone challenges them or points out their flaws. If you find yourself frequently getting defensive or lashing out when criticized, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Learn to take feedback constructively and use it as an opportunity for growth.

8. You have a need for control.

Narcissists often have a strong need for control and become upset when things don’t go according to their plans. They may try to micromanage people or become controlling in relationships. If you find yourself frequently trying to control situations or people, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Learn to let go of the need for control and trust that people can handle things in their own way.

9. You struggle with intimacy.

serious woman long dark hair outside

Narcissists often struggle with intimacy and have difficulty forming deep, meaningful connections with other people. They may view relationships as transactional and struggle to empathize with their partner’s needs. If you find yourself frequently pushing people away or struggling to form close bonds, it’s a sign that your self-absorption may be getting in the way. Work on developing your emotional intelligence and learning to prioritize your partner’s needs.

10. You have a “my way or the highway” attitude.

Narcissists often have a rigid, inflexible way of thinking and expect people to conform to their views and preferences. They may become angry or dismissive when someone disagrees with them or suggests an alternative approach. If you find yourself frequently shutting down dissenting opinions or refusing to compromise, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Learn to be open-minded and consider other perspectives.

11. You have a constant need for attention.

blonde woman serious looking at camera

Do you feel like you’re not getting enough attention or recognition? Narcissists often have an insatiable need for attention and will go to great lengths to secure it, even if it means behaving inappropriately or causing drama. If you find yourself constantly seeking the spotlight or becoming upset when you’re not the center of attention, it’s a clear sign that you’re becoming too self-absorbed.

12. You struggle to apologize or admit fault.

Narcissists have a hard time admitting when they’re wrong or apologizing for their behavior. They often blame people for their mistakes or refuse to take responsibility for their actions. If you find yourself frequently making excuses or becoming defensive when confronted about your behavior, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Learn to take accountability and apologize sincerely when you’ve messed up.

13. You have an exaggerated sense of your own abilities.

frustrated woman leaning against wall

Do you tend to overestimate your skills, knowledge, or achievements? Narcissists often have an inflated view of their own abilities and may exaggerate their accomplishments or claim expertise in areas where they have little experience, WebMD explains. If you find yourself frequently bragging or embellishing the truth to impress people, it’s a sign that you may be too self-absorbed. Practice humility and let your actions speak for themselves.

14. You struggle with envy and jealousy.

serious man sitting in office

Narcissists often struggle with intense feelings of envy and jealousy when they see other people succeeding or receiving praise. They may try to undermine or sabotage their perceived rivals, or become consumed with resentment and bitterness. If you find yourself frequently comparing yourself to everyone around you or feeling envious of their achievements, it’s a sign that your self-absorption may be getting out of hand. Learn to celebrate other people’s successes and focus on your own personal growth.

15. You have a “the rules don’t apply to me” mentality.

woman with crossed arms at home

Do you believe that you’re above the rules or that they don’t apply to you? Narcissists often have a sense of entitlement and believe that they should be exempt from the norms and expectations that govern people’s behavior. If you find yourself frequently breaking rules, cutting in line, or expecting special treatment, it’s a clear sign that you’re becoming too self-absorbed. Remember that the rules exist for a reason and that everyone should be held to the same standards.

Phoebe Mertens is a writer, speaker, and strategist who has helped dozens of female-founded and led companies reach success in areas such a finance, tech, science, and fashion. Her keen eye for detail and her innovative approach to modern womanhood makes her one of the most sought-out in her industry, and there's nothing she loves more than to see these companies shine.

With an MBA from NYU's Stern School of Business and features in Forbes and Fast Company she Phoebe has proven she knows her stuff. While she doesn't use social media, she does have a private Instagram just to look at pictures of cats.