Are You Desirable? 12 Must-Have Traits Guys Look For in Women

Most guys have learned to adjust the image they have in their mind of the ideal woman. If they’re smart, they realize that they can’t create a Franken-girlfriend with Kate Upton’s boobs, Kristen Wiig’s sense of humor, and Jennifer Lawrence’s personality. No girl is perfect, and while deal breakers will always vary from guy to guy, there are some things that pretty much every guy wants.

  1. She’s hard to get, but not bitchy. She knows what it’s like to make a guy work for it, but she’s not cruel and will give him a chance if he’s truly interested. She respects herself enough to not rush into anything without knowing he’s for real, but once a guy proves himself, she’s completely open to the possibility of love.
  2. She calls guys out on their BS. While she can be open-hearted and kind, she’s not afraid to shut down any guy who disrespects her, whether by lying, cheating, or just acting like an a-hole. She stands up for herself and the people she cares about, and no guy has the power to make her complacent.
  3. She cares about herself. Her emotional, mental and physical well-being are of utmost importance to her. Healthy people come in all shapes and sizes, and she doesn’t have to have the body of Jennifer Aniston to be considered in shape. Guys want to be with a girl who cares about her health, and that will come across more in what she does to stay active rather than the number on the scale.
  4. She takes pride in her physical appearance. Guys have no idea how much work actually goes into the “natural” look, but they’d much rather a girl spent time on makeup that doesn’t make her look like a completely different person. He still wants to recognize the person he wakes up next to.
  5. She’s open and affectionate. The perfect girlfriend would never try to hide him away, or be ashamed to be seen with him. She’s supportive, never naggy, and might even brag to her friends about how great he is once in awhile. When they’re together, she lets him know she cares and doesn’t deal in emotional manipulation.
  6. She enjoys sex and trying new things in bed. We all settle for sex that is less that satisfying sometimes. But if a guy is going to commit for the long haul with one girl, she sure as hell better be the best sex he’s ever had (and vice versa, as well).
  7. She doesn’t get hung up on her insecurities. Guys want to be with a girl who knows who she is and is happy with it. He doesn’t want to have to turn the lights off during sex because she’s worried about her flabby thighs. He doesn’t want to have to always stand on the left in photos because she thinks one side of her face looks better than the other. Sure, there will be things she isn’t 100% happy with, but she’s able to see the bigger picture.
  8. She enjoys looking her best – but it’s not all for him. Her outfit choices probably don’t always revolve around a plunging neckline, but sometimes she’ll choose something specifically because she knows he’ll love it. To him, that means his opinion matters to her, and obviously she wants to turn him on. However, at the end of the day, she dresses up because it makes her feel sexy, and that’s what’s most important.
  9. She has her own life. No guy wants to start dating a girl and have her suddenly claim all his friends as her own, move into his apartment, and start calling his mother “Mom.” If he goes away for the weekend, she won’t be texting him every five minutes, because she has plans of her own. She had a life before him, and she isn’t going to toss it aside just because she’s in a relationship now.
  10. She’s not afraid to stuff her face in front of him. It may not happen frequently, but she’s been known to eat him under the table once or twice, and she’s fine with that. She’d rather indulge once in awhile and actually enjoy her food than obsessively count every calorie.
  11. She’s unapologetically real. Guys want a girl who can be herself without worrying what other people think. She’s may not be perfect, but doesn’t need to be. She owns her flaws, and would never let a guy, or anyone else for that matter, make her feel like she’s not good enough.
  12. She’s drama-free. Most guys don’t enjoy constant fighting. Girls who are drama magnets will reveal themselves early on, and they’ll find themselves single soon after.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.