Bad At Kissing: What To Do When Someone’s Lip-Locking Technique Needs Serious Work

When you’re dating someone who’s super attractive and you’re really into them, obviously you’d like to spend as much time as possible with your lips on theirs (among other things). But what the hell are you supposed to do if the guy or gal you’re crazy about is bad at kissing? Whether they don’t understand the concept of moving their head or they leave you with a face full of slobber, there’s not much worse than someone who struggles when it comes to locking lips. However, before you throw in the towel, try these methods to get things on the right track.

  1. Offer some non-verbal guidance. Sometimes this is the simplest way to deal with someone who’s bad at kissing and also the most effective. If you’re confident with your skills, use your hands and your mouth to teach them how to do better. Whatever it is they’re doing “wrong” (or not to your liking) could probably be corrected by you sort of guiding them with your body. This also makes the kiss even hotter and you might find that things escalate pretty quickly from there.
  2. Ask them what they like. Sometimes just talking about kissing can make the act of doing it that much better. Ask your partner what kind of kiss they like. It could be that they’re not doing it “bad” but that your styles are just different and they’re offering up what they want to get back. If you recognize during the course of your conversation that this is the case, you can maybe find a way to meet in the middle.
  3. Tell them what turns you on. Likewise, don’t be afraid to open up about what you’re into. By verbalizing the kind of kiss you like, you’re not only clearly communicating to your partner what they should be doing, but you’re also probably going to get them even more turned on and keen to try and please you. They won’t be bad at kissing for long!
  4. Be frank about what’s going wrong. If none of the above are working, you may need to have an honest conversation with your partner about the kissing problem. If they think it’s going great but you’re just not into it, chances are they’re going to pick up on that in the end. Instead of waiting until they start to get paranoid that you’re not into them or feeling bad about themselves, let them know that the kissing isn’t working for you. They might have just missed out on the earlier hints but can try something different when you spell it out for them directly.
  5. Decide how important kissing is to you. At the end of the day, maybe their kissing style will simply never approve and what you’ve got is all you’re getting in this way. Is that okay with you? Could you deal with the fact that they’re your ideal partner in every way except for this one? You’ll have to do some real soul-searching to figure out where you stand and then make a decision so you can move forward.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia