Being Alone Isn’t Actually A Bad Thing, So Stop Fearing It

Being single has its pros and cons, but one thing’s for sure: it’s not the end of the world. If one of the reasons you haven’t ended a relationship is because you’re afraid to be alone, that’s normal. A lot of people feel that way, but it shouldn’t be the only reason you stay with someone. The thought of being on your own can be scary, especially if you haven’t been single for awhile, but people do it every day, in fact, there are hundreds of thousands of people doing it right now, and they’re just fine. Happy even. A lot of things in life are scary at first, but you do them anyway. You figure it out, and you adjust. Because that’s what life is about.

  1. Being in a bad relationship is a lot scarier. Think about it. Would you rather deal with the stress of being in an unhappy relationship for the rest of your life, or wake up every morning, refreshed from a good night’s sleep, without a single guy-related worry on your mind? Simply being in a relationship, regardless of who you’re with, does not solve all your problems.
  2. You aren’t really alone just because you’re single. What about all your friends, family, and even coworkers who love you? Do they mean nothing? Not having a boyfriend doesn’t not mean you have nobody at all. So appreciate the people who love you unconditionally, because they need your attention too.
  3. ‘Single’ isn’t a bad word. There’s no rule that declares being single bad and being in a relationship good. It all depends on how you look at it and what you want for yourself. We’re all on different paths, and there’s no reason to see being single as a negative thing.
  4. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Just because you’re single doesn’t mean no one wants you. People aren’t looking at you and going “ew, she’s single, what’s wrong with her?” Being single by choice is perfectly legitimate, and it means you’re comfortable with who you are, and don’t need anyone else to define you.
  5. Relationships aren’t easy. Sometimes commitment is the thing you should be afraid of. It takes hard work to make a relationship work, and if you aren’t up for it, it could end up in heartbreak. If you can’t handle that possibility, being single is probably the better choice for now.
  6. It’s important to learn how to be on your own. Even if you’re in a relationship, you still need to have a life outside of that. If you’re comfortable being alone and capable of filling your free time, you won’t rely so much on your boyfriend when you do have one, and that’s what a healthy relationship is all about.
  7. You’ll have way more time for yourself. What’s scary about being able to watch all the reality TV you want, getting a great night’s sleep every time, and never being obligated to go to family events you don’t want to go to? Sounds pretty great to me.
  8. You’ve been alone before, and you’ll be alone again. No one is in a relationship their entire lives. But still, we spend so much time pining after what we don’t have that we forget to appreciate the great things about being single. You won’t be alone forever, so stop obsessing and just live.
  9. You’ll be so busy focusing on yourself that you’ll barely even notice. Admit it, your career, friendships, and relationships with your family could always use a little more attention. Throw all your energy into those things, and stop making dating a priority for a little while. Then you’ll see that life in the single lane isn’t so bad after all.
  10. You’ll be available when someone great comes along. If you’re too busy trying to save a failing relationship, you aren’t going to see the great guy who’s perfect for you when he’s right in front of you. We all have baggage, but it’s a lot easier to transition from single to dating than it is to go from in a serious relationship, right into dating someone else.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.