Being Nice Is One Thing, But Stop Letting Him Walk All Over You

True kindness is a quality that’s in short supply, but there’s a difference between being genuinely warm and caring and being so “nice” that you end up becoming a doormat. You should never be afraid to rock the boat or to stand up for yourself when something’s not right. If you struggle with having a backbone and are tired of getting walked all over, here’s what you should start doing instead:

  1. Don’t put up with being treated badly. If he’s treating you like trash, dump him. If someone is making you feel like a piece of crap, stand up and tell them. Don’t accept the crao that other people are dishing out. You deserve to be treated with kindness, courtesy, and consideration. Don’t put up with bad behavior from jerks or friends who don’t care about you.
  2. Set higher standards for yourself. It’s time to raise the bar. Don’t just settle for what you’re given; set your standards higher and get what you actually want. If you’re tired of always being someone’s booty call, you need to put your foot down and stop letting it happen. Set a standard for how you treat yourself and for how others should treat you. If someone doesn’t meet those standards, get them out of your life.
  3. Realize that you’re the one in charge of your life. Own this feeling and you’ll feel unstoppable. No one else can tell you how to live your life. You need to take responsibility and stop letting life just happen to you. You’re in charge of how you feel, think, and act, so it’s time to start living like that. Don’t let losers tell you what to do or how you should think/feel/act/be. Make your own choices and live by your own rules.
  4. Don’t let him make all the decisions. Ladies can wear the pants in a relationship too — you don’t have to let him make all the rules and decisions, and you definitely shouldn’t. Stop worrying about hurting his feelings or stepping on his toes and speak your mind, especially when it’s something that’s important to you and something you know is right.
  5. If he’s a jerk, call him out. Seriously, don’t just let it go — tell him that he’s being a jerk. If he hurt your feelings or broke your heart, you have a right to tell him how you feel. Don’t shrug it off thinking it will be different next time. It won’t. Staying quiet about poor treatment will only make him think he can continue with it, so don’t let him.
  6. Stop giving any weight to other people’s negativity. If you have negative people in your life, you need to start weeding them out right away. You don’t have to — nor should you — let other people’s bad attitudes affect your personal happiness and well-being. When people start being negative around you, change the subject or walk away. It really is that simple.
  7. Know that you have a right to your opinions. You may not feel like your opinion matters, but it does. We all have a voice and should use that to express our thoughts and feelings. Don’t hold them inside just to be polite or because you’re afraid of offending someone. Say what you really think and feel, and be unapologetic about it, so long as it’s not intentionally mean or hurtful.
  8. Stop being so forgiving. Yes, it’s good to forgive other people, but not 100 percent of the time. We tend to give people one too many chances in the hope that they’ll change in the future, but they always go back to their old ways. If a friend or a boyfriend is treating you wrong and you keep forgiving them, maybe it’s time you accepted the fact that you’re being taken advantage of and need to walk away.
  9. Put your foot down. If you feel strongly about something, it’s okay to be stubborn and stick to it. You have a right to stand up for yourself and decide when enough is enough, and you don’t have to be swayed by people who don’t understand or agree with you. Boundaries exist for a reason — define yours and stick to them.
  10. Learn to rely solely on yourself. Ladies, stop relying on others for the basic things in lfie. It’s not someone else’s responsibility to take care of you, to make you happy, or to buy you things. YOU are your own source of happiness, and the more you realize that and develop that sense of happiness, the less you’ll need to put up with people who treat you poorly for the sake of not losing that source of fulfillment. You can do this.
Freelance copywriter and blogger with a passion for witty words and smart phrases. After a few lackluster years in the corporate world, she recently ditched her “normal” job to pursue her entrepreneurial passions and travel the world. Taco lover, animal lover, and all around girl boss. She's here to inspire you to get off your ass and make your dreams happen. When she's not writing, she is probably reading, doing yoga or just spending time with friends and family.