Being Single Is Awesome — Here Are 15 Reasons To Love Not Having A Guy

Settling into your single life can be awesome. In fact, it can be so awesome, your desire to date can go down with every passing week:

  1. You get over needing someone. Breakups are a bitch, and you have to allow yourself time to heal. Once you’re through the worst of it, life starts to look up. You learn to enjoy it on your own and realize that you don’t always have to have a partner in crime. You can do awesome stuff alone too. It can be fun to have someone along for the ride, but it’s definitely not necessary.
  2. You start enjoying your singlehood. When you stop being sad, you begin seeing how awesome a life without any responsibility to anyone else can truly be! You get to do whatever you want, whenever you want, with whoever you want. It’s pretty great. Once you get used to it, it’s very hard to give that up for anyone, no matter how much you like them.
  3. You get used to your independence. You figure out how to do everything on your own and you’re damn good at it. This makes you feel empowered and strong. Why would you forsake that for a silly guy? It doesn’t feel worth the trade-off, especially if it’s some random you don’t even know. Dating becomes less appealing in the face of the awesome life you already enjoy.
  4. You have time and energy for other priorities. Once you got that last dirtbag out of your life, it freed up so much space for everyone else! You have time for your hobbies, your friends, and even some new adventures you were putting off before. It’s awesome not to feel guilty every time you do something that doesn’t involve him. It’s very difficult to justify giving that up to start dating again. He’d better be really awesome if you’re going to compromise for him.
  5. You start to love who you are when you’re on your own. It feels great to be able to attribute 100% of your accomplishments to you and you alone. You lost a guy, but you gained an entire world of girl boss! You start to make friends who are goal oriented and surround yourself with people who affect you positively. You like yourself so much better now that you don’t want to change for a guy ever again.
  6. Dating is a lot of effort. If you’re pretty much happy with yourself and your life, it’s difficult to find a reason to go out and look for a guy. Dating’s not as easy as it used to be. Sure, you can talk to some guy you met online, but it’s not the same. It’s hard to meet people and then it’s hard to make plans. Even if you end up hitting it off, you have to devote a lot of time and effort to this new person. Meh.
  7. It takes time away from everything else. If you’ve built a rich and full life while single, you don’t want to give that up. You only have so many hours in the day, and you’re building a strong foundation for your future. Sometimes, you really have no time to date. It’s nothing personal; it’s just hard to want to expend effort going out with someone who you don’t even know.
  8. Dating is the worst. Let’s be real — it totally is. Unless you meet someone, start as friends, and it grows naturally, dating can really suck. You have to spend all this time and effort setting up a date and hoping this dude isn’t a serial killer, and then 90% of your dates are totally horrible. Maybe 8% of them are okay, but you wouldn’t go out with him again. That elusive 2% who are great matches for you can only keep you hanging on for so long.
  9. You’re okay with waiting to find someone. The trial and error of dating strangers? No thanks. You’d rather live your life happily and quietly and wait for the right one to come along. You don’t have the emotional or mental energy to waste on a bunch of losers and douchebags. Weeding through the ranks can be endlessly tiring. If you never find a wonderful guy, you’d rather stay single than settle.
  10. You’re not desperate. You might’ve been that thirsty in the past, but you aren’t now! You’re not going to waste hours of your day seeking out guys who are at best tepidly interested in meeting you (and vice versa). You don’t need that crap in your life. Instead, you build an interesting and complex world to live in of your own. If some guy decides he’d like to join you there, that’d be great. Otherwise, you’ll be fine without him.
  11. You get focused on your own crap. Living as an independent entity forces you to make your own decisions. You have to take care of yourself, and that requires commitment and focus. Once you’re there and great things begin happening, the last thing on your mind is running around chasing some guy.
  12. Trying to meet anyone decent is difficult. It gets harder the older you get, too. Online dating is BS – no one actually wants to meet up and there’s always something better one swipe away. Meeting people out socially gets harder as your circles of friends narrow and everyone gets caught up in serious relationships. It seems like every good guy is already taken. It’s easier not to worry about it at all.
  13. Dating is expensive. When you’re a responsible grown woman paying your own bills, every dollar counts. If you’re single, you can make the decision to opt out of social activities and stay home when money is tight. You can ask friends over to hang out at your place or engage in free hangouts like hikes. When you’re seeing someone, especially at first, you want to go out and do fun stuff. If you’re like most young single ambitious women nowadays, you’re going to end up splitting the bill. Adds up.
  14. You’re safe when you’re single. This means you don’t have to deal with any drama. Relationships, like it or not, are often rife with emotional, mental, and even physical stress. They can affect your entire life adversely. At least when you’re alone you know what’s coming. You probably don’t fight with anyone and hardly ever cry. Your days are relatively calm and peaceful because you have control over the majority of what’s happening in your life.
  15. There’s no risk of being hurt. This is maybe the hardest thing to let go of when you’re single. You probably went through a rough breakup and it’s difficult to let yourself go to a place of vulnerability with a new person. You are comfortably settled in a position where you feel strong and capable and no one else has any say over your emotions. If you start to care about someone, you have to let go and open up. This can be terrifying. Often the risk doesn’t feel worth the reward. Whether or not it actually is all depends.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at amyhorton.net.
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