Being single has the potential to be frustrating, but I happen to think it’s a huge asset to any woman. When I was living the single life, I focused on myself so much that something awesome happened — I became confident in myself. Here are 10 ways that being single changed me for the better:
- I Didn’t Have To Impress Anyone. I spent a lot of time in relationships worrying about how I came off to my partner. In some instances, I was so self-conscious that I hid the quirkier aspects of my personality for fear of coming across as ‘weird.’ Being single for a while made me comfortable in my skin because I was free to be myself, odd habits and all.
- I Got To Learn More About Myself. Influence as a whole isn’t a bad thing. Some of my favorite movies, TV shows, and music were introduced to me through people who listened to or watched it first. While I was on my own, I was able to draw opinions on what I loved, liked and hated on pretty much everything.
- I Didn’t Waste Time In Dead-End Relationships. If you’re worried that being single is the worst thing in the world, don’t worry — I can safely say that being in a dead-end relationship is honestly so damn worse. After a couple of crash-and-burn experiences, I stopped settling for just anything and thought about exactly what I wanted in a guy. It made it easier for me to pick guys with potential in the long run.
- I Dressed Up Just For Me. We’re all guilty of dressing in a certain way that’s meant to impress someone else. It’s definitely true in relationships, at least for me. I was so concerned about being ‘cute’ all the time that it got exhausting. When I felt like getting dressed to the nines during my single years, I appreciated it more because I was doing it for me.
- My Good Friends Became My BFF’s. No boyfriend = extra time to hang out with friends that I was already pretty close to, but we created even stronger bonds. From spending time at home to girls’ nights out, we made some great memories and went from good friends to BFF’s, which may not have happened if we weren’t all single at the time.
- I Excelled At Work. I’ve always been an ambitious person but, being in a relationship had a tendency to distract me from my career goals. When it came to work, not having a special someone helped me channel all my energy into my job, which lead to success, praise, and feeling on top of the world.
- I Stopped Waiting For Love. For a while, I’d been single for so long that I wondered if it was meant for me to find someone new. I’d bum myself out on occasions like Valentine’s Day because I didn’t have anyone to spend it with on a personal level. I realized that there was no reason to avoid those days; I could still celebrate them with friends and family, or even on my own. I’d find a partner when it was time, but I needed to focus on me.
- I Kept Things Casual & Had Fun. Flirting and ‘the chase’ definitely has its place in a single girl’s life. It’s okay to entertain a guy while out with friends or on the occasional date. Walking into those situations with no expectations kept things fun and stress-free. No worrying about first impressions or second dates — if it happened, cool. If it didn’t, that was okay too.
- I Set Goals For Myself & Achieved Them. The time designated for my past relationships reverted to me, and I have to say it was great. I spent time working on hobbies or just fulfilling commitments to myself that I’d put off before. I organized my apartment, went to the gym, and caught up on books I’d been wanting to read for a while. Doing those things made me feel accomplished, which gave me a huge confidence boost.
- Guys Were Drawn To My Happiness. In a bit of irony, I noticed that the longer I went on my own, the more guys would approach me. The confidence radiated from me and sent guys the message that I was a go-getter who didn’t need a relationship to make me whole. In the end, being single for a while lead to my best relationship — which lead to marriage.