It’s Better To Let Someone Walk Away From You Than All Over You

Despite knowing that you’re in a relationship with someone who treats you like garbage, it can still be hard to leave a person you care about. Many times, though, you don’t even have to worry about breaking up with the jerk you’re dating; he’ll do the dirty work for you when he realizes it’s only a matter of time before you stop putting up with his crap. It might hurt at first, but this is why he did you a solid by ending things:

  1. Staying with the wrong person for too long can mess you up. If a guy who isn’t treating you right decides to leave, consider it a blessing in disguise. Sticking with someone like that is only going to mess with your head and heart, leaving you worse off both while you’re in the relationship and after it ends. If he wants to leave, let him. You’ll be better off for it.
  2. Losing him is better than losing your self-respect. When you date a guy who treats you like a doormat, you’re sacrificing part of yourself for someone who really doesn’t deserve it. It might be a little hard if he leaves, but it’s nothing in comparison to how you’ll feel if you let your dignity wash down the drain by keeping him around. You’re a strong woman, and you shouldn’t give that up for anyone.
  3. You deserve to be treated as an equal. Don’t settle for anything less. A guy who sees you as beneath him isn’t worth your time. You know what you want in a partnership, and deep down, you can tell that this isn’t it. You’re worth so much more than what he’s giving you, so even though you think you’re losing him, he’s the one who’s truly missing out.
  4. He isn’t the best guy out there. You might have convinced yourself that even though the way he’s treating you really sucks, it’s the best you’re likely to get. But the truth is that there are plenty of men out there who wouldn’t make you feel like a lesser partner; you’re just having a hard time seeing them through the crap-covered glasses this guy’s making you wear.
  5. It’s better to be single than with someone who treats you like crap. No matter how lousy a relationship is, it can be scary to be single again once you’ve gotten comfortable with someone. But don’t fret about him peacing out just because you don’t want to be alone. It’s probably (definitely) going to suck at first, but in time, you’re going to realize that this guy did you a huge favor by letting you focus all your love on yourself instead of him.
  6. You’re too strong to put up with something like this. You’ve sworn up and down your whole damn life that you’d never stick with a guy who treated you like brass when you’re made of gold, and yet, here you are. Don’t be too hard on yourself: it’s easy to get wrapped up in something like this when the guy hooks you in early. But once you realize that he’s treating you like garbage, it’s time to take steps to make your exit. You know you’re too good for this BS, so stick up for yourself and create the happy ending your badass self deserves.
  7. If he leaves you, he’s only helping you. No one enjoys being the person who gets left, but if that’s what he’s threatening to do because you stood up to his crap, the best thing you can do is to hold the door open for him so he can make his exit even quicker. He’s taking all the hard work out of breaking up. In a few months, when you’re happy and can’t remember what you saw in him in the first place, consider sending him a thank-you card for the massive favor he did for you.
  8. You’re not a bad person for sticking up for yourself. If you’re belittled and criticized for standing up to his douchiness, it’s just more proof that this is an unhealthy relationship. He might try to turn it against you and use it as an excuse for leaving, but really, he’s just upset he can’t talk down to you without consequences anymore.
  9. The right man will lift you up, not bring you down. You can absolutely find a guy who makes you feel good about yourself, so why would you mourn the absence of one who makes you feel unworthy of him? This dude might have treated you well a while back, but those times are long gone. If he leaves, just think of him as a lesson not to ever tolerate that kind of treatment again.
  10. The sooner he’s out of your life, the sooner you’ll feel like yourself again. Be grateful that he left when he did. Now he’s given you even more time to move on and continue a much happier life without him. It’s so much better that you’re free now instead of being walked all over by this guy for even longer.
Averi is a word nerd and Brazilian jiu jitsu brown belt. She's also a TEFL/TESOL-certified ESL teacher and an equine enthusiast. Originally from Pennsylvania, she lived in Costa Rica for a while before moving to Australia. In addition to her work as a writer and editor for Bolde, she also has bylines with Little Things and regularly writes for Jiu-Jitsu Times.

You can follow Averi on Instagram @bjjaveri or on Twitter under the same handle.