Bishop Leaves Church After Falling In Love With Satanic Erotic Fiction Author

A Spanish bishop has resigned from his position with the church in order to pursue a relationship with a “Satanic-tinged erotic fiction” author. As the BBC reports, Xavier Novell was a well-respected member of the Catholic church, having become Spain’s youngest Bishop in 2020 at the age of 41. He also held other controversial beliefs including his support for conversion therapy, his anti-abortion and anti-gay marriage stance, and his love of performing exorcisms. However, he’s left all that behind in order to be with author and psychologist Silvia Caballol.

  1. Novell initially claimed he was resigning for “personal reasons.” The Church said that his decision to leave “came as a surprise last month” and led to several meetings with “Vatican officials as well as the Pope himself.” However, it soon became clear that there was another reason for his resignation.
  2. He fell for Caballol and couldn’t resist. Caballol is the author of books including The Hell of Gabriel’s Lust, with the BBC reporting that a blurb of one of her books promises the reader “a journey into sadism, madness, and lust and a struggle between good and evil, God and Satan with a plot to shake one’s values and religious beliefs.” No wonder Novell was attracted to her.
  3. Novell is now trying to get a job in the secular world. Clearly Caballol’s writing was so convincing that instead of being part of teh church he’s looking to find a job as an agricultural engineer.
  4. The Church has declined to comment on Novell’s exist, calling it “a strictly personal matter.” While many have suggested that Novell’s extremely conservative beliefs (even by Catholic standards) made him extremely unpopular, others have suggested that perhaps Novell himself is actually possessed. Apparently, he first met Caballol after approaching her due to his interest in demonology. LOL to this entire story.
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