In my opinion, commenting on someone’s weight is a total faux pas. However, it seems my ex-boyfriend missed the memo on basic human decency—he repeatedly called me fat despite the fact that I was a totally healthy, normal weight. I don’t condone violence at all, but I couldn’t help myself—I punched him in the face.
Even if he thought I was overweight (which I wasn’t), there are gentler words than “fat.” How freaking rude can you get? My boyfriend could have said chubby, overweight, fluffy, curvy, plump, or literally anything else other than fat. Fat has a cruelty to it that’s unnecessary and is never coming from a good place. Using that word to describe someone is always malicious.
He had no idea how lucky he was—plenty of men would love to be with me. Do I look like a runway model? Absolutely not, but I’m still beautiful in my own way. I love my physical appearance for sure, but I value my mind and my heart a whole lot more. The man I’m with should feel the same way about me. My ex clearly didn’t and it was his loss in the end.
Women already feel insecure enough—we don’t need guys’ negativity. I already know my body isn’t perfect. I’m aware that I don’t have an hourglass figure and that I don’t look like a Kardashian. This is the way I am. I try to eat as healthy as possible and sometimes it’s still hard to lose the weight. Like most women, I have enough insecurities and having my boyfriend telling me I’m fat is a terrible feeling I never want to experience again.
I should mention that I was the same size when we started dating. To me, it seems that my boyfriend was the one with the problem, not me. If I’d gained 30 pounds and he was concerned for me, I might have been a little more understanding, so long as he’d showed a little care in bringing it up. However, it’s clear his comments weren’t about my health.
It’s about what’s on the inside, right? I thought we were all taught that what’s on the inside is what actually matters but my ex didn’t subscribe to that. Obviously physical attraction is important, but if you’re dating a total hottie whose personality you can’t stand, what type of relationship will you have? A sense of humor, generosity, honesty, humility, kindness, and trustworthiness are way more important to me than how hot I think a man is.
He claimed I was “too fat to do anything” but I had no trouble punching him. Again, I don’t condone abuse of any kind but I lost control. He kept going on about how I was always lazy because I didn’t want to go on 20-hour hikes or ride bikes for so long that the seat gave me saddle sores. In reality, it wasn’t my weight that stopped me, it was my hatred for the outdoors. Why would I go outside in 80-degree weather when I could stay in my AC in comfort? Get a clue.
I’m not normally a mean person but I’d had enough. Honestly, I’m not the type of person to just start swinging when my anger gets the better of me. My boyfriend had pushed me too far. It wasn’t like he said it once and I lost it—he’d been berating me about my size for a long time and I couldn’t take it anymore. I know I was wrong and in hindsight, I wish I’d controlled myself better. I’d just been pushed too far.
He threatened to call the cops on me so I called them myself. After I punched him, my ex called me crazy and kept saying he’d call the cops on me. I saved him the trouble and did it myself. The officer on the phone seemed a bit confused at first, but after hearing what led to the incident, he chuckled and said, “Well, young lady, I hope you put your back into it.” I know what I did was wrong, but man, it felt good.
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