Check pretty much any lifestyle or health blog and you’ll likely find some post about the importance of keeping technology out of your bedroom, but booting your phone out of bed is so much easier said than done. Still, we decided to see what would happen if we followed every doctor’s advice and kept phones out of the bedroom—here’s what we discovered.
We fooled around more. The most noticeable change was that we were having sex more frequently. My boyfriend and I already have sex about three times a week, but without our phones to play with, our short attention spans were seeking, uh, other means of entertainment. Gotta say, neither of us had any complaints about it.
Our sex was more attentive. Not only were we having sex more often but it was sweeter, more intimate sex. In general, it felt less like a normal weekday romp (you know, where you want to get off but you’re exhausted and don’t have a lot of time to spare) and more attentive. The lack of phones made it felt like a lazy Sunday morning every day, where we were disconnected from everything but each other. We took things slow, had fun with each other, and actually ~made love~ rather than indulging a much-needed quickie.
Both of us noticed we slept better. On a non-sexual note, both my boyfriend and I noticed we slept so much better without our phones next to us. There were no late-night notifications waking us up and disrupting our REM cycle, just really peaceful, deep sleep. Plus, trying to fall asleep feels like less of a task when you’re just relaxing in the dark rather than keeping your brain awake absorbing content on your phone.
This made us more energized during the day. If we were sleeping better than before, it should come as no surprise that we felt more awake during the day. For starters, there was no hitting snooze 10 million times like we typically would; we found waking up was easy and all those feeling of sluggishness were gone. Best of all, it was felt easier to focus throughout the day after feeling genuinely rested.
Pillow talk got better and better. When we weren’t having fantastic sex or sleeping like babies, my boyfriend and I found that no cell phones forced us to focus on one another in other ways too. Our pillow talk became frequent (like an every night thing) and it was so fun to rehash our day with one another! One of the best parts of living with a partner is being able to celebrate daily victories and commiserate daily annoyances with them, and for the first time, it really felt like we were enjoying each other fully in that way. I love talking to my boyfriend and I’m so glad this experiment reminded me of that.
We had an adorable cuddle sesh first thing every morning. Typically in the morning we would both answer texts, check our emails, and scan through Snapchat before our feet even touched the ground. But now, with no phone to draw our attention, we just had one another. For one thing, this got us out of bed and starting our days much quicker (I was actually on time to work all week, go me!) but it also started this adorable routine: morning cuddle sessions. Some mornings they were longer (or even turned into something more) and others they were just a minute of really enjoying and appreciating each other before the day started. I think I speak for both of us when I say we started our day more grateful and more relaxed this way.
I finally finished the novel I’ve been meaning to read. As a personal accomplishment, I finally finished the novel I’ve been trying to finish for MONTHS. When I wanted to wind down in bed and didn’t have a phone to entertain me, I turned to my book. Doing this most nights of the week had me through 200 pages in literally no time, which was amazing. As a long-time book nerd, it felt so comforting and empowering to be making time to read again. Personal goal, check.
The benefits were good enough that we want to keep this experiment going. The first few days of this experiment weren’t easy. We might have gotten out of bed once or twice to check our notifications in the next room, not going to lie. But once we started noticing the very obvious benefits, it was so much easier to commit to the challenge. To be honest, we’ll still keep phones across the bedroom on the rare occasion that I want to listen to a sleep playlist or my meditation app, but I think it’s safe to say neither of us will bring a phone into bed ever again.
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